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Abi
30/04/2012
I was 15 at the time, i was at my best friends party and she invited her boyfriend. We were all having a drink and doing drunk dares and all that. me and my friends (girls) didnt drink because we were to young. There were 5 bedrooms in the house, 4 were full... of drunk boys and screaming, distraught girls. i was sat on the stairs, plugging my ears when i see my best friend being dragged into her room by her very, very drunk boyfriend, she slapped him and he flung her onto the bed an slammed the door, i banged on the door as hard as i could untill i got light headed and i passed out, i woke up sharply, on the sofa...with a boy undoing my pants, he kissed and said "hey baby, wanna get tough" i screamed and punched him, he undid my pants quicker and we had sex there and then, i was crying and called the police. me and my best friend never spoke of what happened untill right now. We heard that a few of the boys got into trouble, but her now ex boyfriend slid through, and moved away from the uk. We didn't want anybody to know, because we were so violated.
ReplyAbi - 30/04/2012
Shawna
27/04/2012
I have been Married 4 12 years, if my husband wants sex he expects me to have it weather I want it or not if I say no he will keep me up all night arguing and wont leave me alone, I feel I do not have any say so about my body anymore
ReplyShawna - 27/04/2012
A couple of years ago, after a party, I offered a married man that he could sleep in my room, because he said otherwise he would drive home, and I knew that he had been drinking a lot. I tried to stop him from drink driving. When we were in my room, he started coming on to me. I turned him down very resolutely and said "I'm going to sleep now". I was absolutely knackered and fell asleep fully dressed.
Later, I woke up because in my sleep I was fighting, and I found myself struggling in real life too. He had undressed himself and rolled my trousers down to my knees (my upper body was still dressed), and was trying to have sex with me. He said "oh come on, I've already been inside you."
In such a short time span, he ruined my life.
Yet he didn't even seem to understand what he'd done wrong. When he realized how upset I was, he wanted to TALK about it.
I reported it to the police. His wife supported him all throughout the process, and she tried to contact me in a rather aggressive way several times.
I think that the only way a man can become that evil, is when his wife condones it that he takes advantage of her body when she is unconscious, when someone gives him the message that he doesn't need consent for sex on a regular basis.
Anonymous - 28/04/2012
CJ
26/04/2012
My and friend and his girlfriend were in a relationship for a while, they had a active sexual life and had done everything but sex, one day the sex finally happened and the girl didn't say no or anything but the boy decided that they two of them weren't ready for it and pulled out quickly. A few days later the girl said she was forced into it (although she was not) and was claiming it was rape, what situation does this leave my friend in and can the girl make accusations like this?
ReplyCJ - 26/04/2012
Hi CJ
Thanks for you post.
It's very hard to comment on what is happening to your friend as I don't have any detail on what happened in this instance.
Most people who have been raped or sexually assaulted tell the truth. In fact most people do not tell anyone that they have been raped because they feel too ashamed and scared.
Estimates suggest around 8-10% of all rape complaints are false, but there is no evidence to suggest there are more false rape allegations than false allegations of other offences.
Jo
26/04/2012
Im 15 and at that age where everyones put under pressure for 'not doing it' etc but reading some of these stories anger me in a way, if a guy does it to you even if you say no its rape? i hope this has opened the eyes of other people like me who need to take action in their answer, not all guys are like this but the ones that are need to be actually taught
ReplyJo - 26/04/2012
laura
25/04/2012
i have just found out my daughter is pregnant, she is only 14 , she was at a party and the boy she had just started going out with was drunk, he by the way is 15 years old, later in the evening my daughter went to the caravan to use the toilet when she came out he was inside standing in front of the door,she said he started to kiss her and pushed her onto the sofa saying come we can do it, she tried to push him off but he held her down and had sex, she said she was telling him no i dont want to but he carried on, she managed to push him off and ran back to her friends, she said itall happened in about 5 minutes, she didnt tell anyone because she said she was scared, she was a virgin and now she is 6weeks pregnant, she has kept this ordeal to herself untill now, i dont think she understands that it wasnt her fault, our family is in pieses at the moment, he has taken her innocece away, i dont know if this is rape.
Replylaura - 25/04/2012
Hi Laura
Thank you for your post, and I'm so sorry to read about what happended to your daughter.
If your daughter did not consent and was pressured or forced to having sex or taking part in sexual activity, then it is rape and it is a crime.
Also the law also says that to consent to sex a person must be over 16 and have the ability to make informed decisions for themselves.
It is important that your daugheter doesn't blame herself. It might be helpful to talk to ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem www.childline.org.uk.
You can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call National Freephone Rape Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm.
Anon
24/04/2012
When I was 16 I went out for my friends birthday and got pretty drunk. We went back to another friends house for a party after and me and my friend ended up falling asleep after every1 had left. When I was sleeping, I was woken by this guy who was 21, whose house it was. he brought me to a bedroom and forced me up against the door, he shoved his penis inside my mouth so far I couldn't breath. I was drunk but I no I didn't want this to happen so I said no. He then went on on push me onto the bed and took off my dress and I cried no again but it didn't stop him. He forced himself into my anus and put his hand over my mouth to stop me crying. When he was finished he left me lying there. At first I didn't think it was rape because I was drunk and didn't fight back. That was my first sexual experience and I didn't no what was happening. I blame myself as I was drunk and asleep in his house, I must have been asking for it. It is just so hard now to try and move on without constantly thinking of him on top of me, every time I close my eyes I see it again. I've got hope and strength from the stories below that I can go on and eventually be happy, thanks to all that have shared your stories
ReplyAnon - 24/04/2012
Kayleigh
22/04/2012
When I was 16 my boyfriend used to control my every move and had to know everything I was doing. I wasnt allowed to talk to my friends; he made me believe that they were just using me for when they had a problem. We were together for nearly 2 years. I can say that they were the worst 2 years of my life. He used to hit me but he would always say he was sorry and say that he’ll never do it again and because I loved him, I believed him.
ReplyIf he didnt like what I was wearing he would make sure I knew about it. I wasnt allowed to wear any make-up and I couldn’t talk to any guys or sit near any guys in college. He accused me of cheating several times a day while I was in college. I wasnt allowed to use the internet as he believe that I was on facebook talking to other guys and I could use my msn or Skype as he thought I was on cam to other people, he used to think that I was getting naked for guys online. I was so degrading that anyone could think this about the person they are meant to love.
We went on 2 holidays abroad together, 1 with his family and 1 with mine. He hit me infront of his mum and she turned round and said ‘I deserved it.’ I couldnt believe it.
He would do anything so that we had sex. He would try all sorts of things to get me to agree, He used to blackmail me into sex by telling me ‘that if I loved him I would do it and enjoy it.’ If i refused he would pin me down to the bed and have sex with me or he would wait till I was asleep and have sex with me then. I used to wake up with him on top of me and because he was stronger than I wasn’t able to get him off me.
I’m now 19 and we broke up last August cause I finally realised what had been happening ad that it wasnt a healthy relationship. I am now in another relationship and my new boyfriend knows everything that I went through and he says that he will never do anything like that to me and I believe him. Although I’m still getting over everything that has happen I have support and comfort from him and he understands that a just being there for me means everything.
For everyone that believes that they can’t get out of an abusive relationship, you can and you will feel loads better once you do. All it takes is a little encouragement :)
Kayleigh - 22/04/2012
Lauren
22/04/2012
I was at school at the end of the day and i was in the room by my self with my boyfriend and he we kissed and snogged, he touched my vagina and fingered me. Then he pinned me to the table and hurt me. I asked him to stop and he didn't he then forced in sex and i haven't told anyone until now.
ReplyLauren - 22/04/2012
how did you feel about this? it seems you didnt like the way he treated you considering you havent told anyone and the fact he hurt you, let him know! or gain support from people you trust
Jo - 26/04/2012
Anonymous
21/04/2012
a year ago my boyfriend and i were kissing and he started to touch me in a way i was uncomfortable with, i mean like he kept shoving his hand up my skirt, i tried to pull away but couldnt. Weve broken up now and i wouldnt want to do anything now, but I just want to know if this counts as sexual assault...
ReplyAnonymous - 21/04/2012
Yes, it does.
Catalina - 24/04/2012
David
21/04/2012
I have a friend who's name I will not mention, his girlfriend liked a facebook status I put for looks and he gave her lots of grief, swore at her and fell out...she makes his eyes go wang and all over the place he loves her so much but the other day after the argument he went round with his tired eyes on his ped to her house, it was 3am and she asked him to stay round but NO. He wouldn't have it he went home and slept, can we all be aware of tired eye syndrome girls can cause guys, and even if they get mad at status likes etc, some do have really lovely sensitive hearts, PEACE OUT xx
ReplyDavid - 21/04/2012
Theresa
21/04/2012
I have seen sorts of sexual abuse at my school. I do report it and the teachers take care of it. The students think sexual abuse is okay becaue "they live it the south side." I want to help stop this crime in anyway possible, with not just that kind of sexual abuse but I see it on facebook too.
ReplyTheresa - 21/04/2012
Kahris
19/04/2012
Last Year it happened since October when I was new to my Junior High School. I remember one boy I am not sure what year is in but he is in my school. I was at the bus stop talking to my year 8 friend then the boy came over to me and said "You are a minge(is that how you spell it?) He said he was going to have sex with sometime. I was 13 a month before my birthday at the time and I am 14 now. He hasn't said anything ever since.
ReplyKahris - 19/04/2012
Ali
19/04/2012
Hi, I have allegations, as do many other people, against a young man who used to attend my school. Many people have told me that this young man went camping with 2 friends (who were going out at the time), and they had all been drinking. He on one occasion told me that he put his hand down her pants, and started trying to penetrate her with his fingers, in the knowledge that she would assume it was her boyfriend. Is it worth informing anyone of this so justice may be served?
ReplyAli - 19/04/2012
Hi Ali
Thanks for you post.
Being forced or pressured to have sex when someone doesn’t want to is rape and it is a crime and you are right to be concerened if you know this is happeneing to someone you know.
The first thing to do is to speak to your friend/the person this is happening to and help them understand that there is help if you want it .You should encourage your friend to call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about the problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you they can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call the National Domestic Violence Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge)
They will be able to get advice on what to do and what course of action to take.
bo
17/04/2012
rape is not a gd thing people who do it have no lifes its like havent u got anthing better to do and the answere is no u ant cuz more and more girls are getting raped everyday and to tell u the truth i am sick of it people who rape should be sent to a special jail so there they cant rape any more girls
Replybo - 17/04/2012
Jermaine
15/04/2012
I believe this website is very effective at providing advise to girls about rape, but what about men? Many men are pressured into sex and other sexual activities by their partners and are unable to do anything about it because they are being controlled by their girlfriends and would feel embarrassed if they were to tell anyone as it would seem as they are too weak, because they are being controlled by females. many females stop their boyfriends from communicating with other girls via text messages, social networks or in person, if it was the other way round it would be looked down upon and would be classed as abuse. I feel that all these videos and other government programmes , involuntarily paid for by the public, only help the young females in society and not the young males, who are often susceptible to this sort of abuse. In this day and age, men are encouraged to act respectively towards women and when they don't it is automatically deemed as a crime, but when women act controllably towards men society treats it as if it does not matter. I feel that this is not fair and the law should cover females abusing men and not only males abusing females.
ReplyJermaine - 15/04/2012
Kyle
15/04/2012
Hi, is it possible for a boy to be raped by a girl?
ReplyKyle - 15/04/2012
Hi Kyle
Thank you for posting and raising an issue about which people often wonder about.
The law says that rape can only be committed by a man as for the offence to be committed there must be intentional penetration of the vagina, anus or mouth of another person with a penis.
A woman can be convicted of sexual assault, which includes other sexual acts. Both are crimes and can result in imprisonment. You can read more about rape and sexual assault here: http://thisisabuse.direct.gov.uk/worried-about-abuse/view/rape-sexual-assult
Claire
13/04/2012
we were at this party, and whilst we were dancing a friend that i met 4 days ago, came up and put his arms around me, and then he kissed me... but he said that it was too warm in the club and that he needed a drink, so we went outside and started kissing by the side of the building, and these leaders followed us, so we split up, and he told me to go that way... i got up there, and he was behind a tree, in a forest, but there was leaders behind me so i ran towards him, not thinking. We kissed behind a tree, and asked me if i wanted sex, but i said no, but he said he'll do anything for me, but i still refused... so we kissed again, but then he tried to undo my bra, and i didnt no what to do, so i was like stop and he said sorry, but next, he tried to undo my trousers and started to thrust me against a tree, i couldnt stop him, i didnt no what to do, and to finish it off, he kept feeling me up, and he got my hand and put it down his pants. I couldnt pull away, and i was scared that he would hurt me. But thankfully, my friends were calling my name, and i said that they knew where i was... so i ran as fast as i could away from him. Is this rape?
ReplyClaire - 13/04/2012
Hi Claire
Thanks for sharing your story.
The law states that rape is when a man forces his penis into the vagina, anus or mouth of another person when that person doesn't want him to do so; the law calls this 'without consent'.
What you describe sounds more like sexual assault which is also crime. Sexual assault can take many forms such as objects or parts of the body (e.g. a finger) being put into someone's vagina or anus when that person didn't want it to happen or someone being touched in a sexual way that makes him or her feel uncomfortable or frightened. This could be through their clothes (like bottom pinching).
The most important bit to remember is that being pressured or forced to have sex when you don't want to is a crime.
It is important you tell someone as soon as possible and not keep it to yourself. Telling someone what has happened means that you can get the support you need. The person you do talk to should be someone that you trust and feel comfortable with. You may choose to tell: a friend, parent, G.P or a school teacher.
You can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call National Freephone Rape Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm.
Sam
12/04/2012
I think it's wrong for the focus to also be solely on 'straight-rape'. Young gay boys/men are similarly vulnerable, and should be equally aware of the dangers of an aggressive and dominant partner
ReplySam - 12/04/2012
Ben
10/04/2012
I went out with a girl for 10 months (im 17, she's 18) and we never had sex despite it being both of our first relationships. Although everyone else was doing it, as is accurately depicted on this site, i felt it was more important to wait and ensure she were to be comfortable when doing it. Despite getting a lot of stick for never having sex, after such a long time of waiting, we tried, but as note to boys, if sex is more important to you than your girl, move on, if sex is important to you, your relationship is likely to become severely strained in my opinion. Never is rape or blackmail right, women should not be seen as facilitators to mens desires, (and vice-versa), but i'd urge for boys to move on in times of difficulty as the relationship is only more likely to weaken, and frustration in some cases brings about a higher tendencies of rape for certain people.
ReplyAlthough I, more than anyone understands a boys point of view, just leave the girl if sex is that important to you, there are plenty of fish in the sea that can give you sex easily, readily and when you want it.
One issue i would raise with this site, is that although less prone, men are not always to blame for the case of rape, this blame should not always be expected to fall upon the head of males. This perhaps is worth keeping in mind.
Ben - 10/04/2012
Anoymous
09/04/2012
My best freind had a boyfreind, the one every girl fancied. She told me everything, and 1 month into the releationship he asked her to have sex with him. She didn't want to but she couldn't think of any other way to show she loved him. She said no anyway.
ReplyAt a party i was a little bit tipsy, and I couldn't find my freind any where. Then her boyfreind came over to me and sat next to me. He took me upstairs and made me do it....... 2 days later he broke up with my best freind and was arrested for rape a month later.
If this get's out, more people will be aware and more disgusting people like my freinds boyfreind will be bought to justice.
Anoymous - 09/04/2012
vicky
07/04/2012
what about the people who have sat in silence, and not told anybody about what happened to them... surely this would remind people of what happened to them? I know the advertisement is with good intentions but maybe they didn't think it through properly?
Replyvicky - 07/04/2012
khan
05/04/2012
very very good i like it very much it will help to stop these bad things from this good country i love this idea ..THIS IS ABUSE
Replykhan - 05/04/2012
faisel
05/04/2012
Nice
Replyfaisel - 05/04/2012
Jo
04/04/2012
I think that these videos are a real eye opener to people like myself that wouldn't of even thought that the relationship they were in was unacceptable. I was with a guy for 2 and a half years, everything was great at first, then it started to run off the rails, I would be shouted at and told i was stupid nearly every time i saw him, i would also be ignored most of the time when at his house, unless he wanted sex, then it was okay for him to come off his computer, do his business and then go straight back onto the pc, my life was even threatened at one point, I am so grateful that i am out of that relationship, even though it took me a long time to leave it, but i don't feelt that I will be able to trust a guy properly again. These videos should definatly stay up.
ReplyJo - 04/04/2012
ange
04/04/2012
i was with this guy who seemed really nice andall lovely at the start of the relationship, it was all a front.
Replyhe messed with my head and would try to "pleasure" me then give up because id keep try to stop him however because is still tried id have to give him something in return. if i didnt id be called names, ignored or he would keep asking untill he got it. three weeks into the relationship he asked for sex i sed no and so he carried on asking and convinced me that i wanted it too (although i thought i wanted to i knew deep down that i didnt) from then every time i saw him i would have to have sex, not just once sometimes up to five times.
i wasnt aloud to see other my friends because he didnt like them so i hung around with him constantly eventually my friends stopped talking to me and he told me that he was all i had next he got me to belive my family didnt like me either, which wasnt hard as my mother and i have always clashed. i felt like i was alone.
if i didnt reply to his texts or awnser his calls i would get told i was worthless pathetic and a waste of his time but then he would say but i dont care because i love you and you are my baby, this made me think that things were ok.
things got worse and worse and i got deppressed and didnt eat much, only dinner, my nine yeasrold brother ate two thirds more than me.
he eventually had a go at me for being ill and there for not looking good (i was in jeans and a hoodie no make up) it was all wrong as i had to wear tight tops leggings or hot pants (basicly wear the skipyest things i owned) and had to at all times in the day wear make up and alot of it too. any way he had a go at me so i hung up because i was too up set as i was ill and i went out to see him and i still wasnt good enough. he ended it through text.
the next day he kept ringing and texting some were nice but the majority were harsh and agressive filled with swear words. so all means of communication were cut, so he sent my sister and parents appoligies wich was really creepy.
we both started collage and he stalked me round for two months messing with my head treating me nice then as soon as he kissed me be nasty i eventually blocked his mobile number house nymber and parents mobile numbers and blocked him off facebook.
he eventually left me alone. but im not over it five months on. and these adds bring it back but so does seeing him at collage
he has now got a new girlfriend they have been together like four months and he is treating her the same way, i find it sickening. but the wort part is he knows two of my friends and is now hanning around with us after keeping away from me for so long. its kinda funny as no-one talks to him but he just sits and listens watching me. when he is about i cant relax or eat and my friends find it difficult to understand and thiknk im looking into things but he isnt hanning around with us because he knows them most of them dont know who he is and the constant watching me, i dont know what to do because ive asked him to keep away from me but he laughed. i dont know what to do as the collage dont help i just get sent to talk to a brick wall (counseller)
ange - 04/04/2012
I know exactly how you feel... I've had it done to me. Luckily I may see the gremlin once a year know if he's lucky and everytime he sees me he stares at me and makes me feel uncomfortable.. It was 4 years ago and i'm still not over it.. I have just putting a comment on sticking up for people like us saying that its not always good to put videos like this on TV as it can remind us of what happened. Anyways, if you want to talk to anyone I'm here for you :)
vicky - 07/04/2012
Hi Ange
Thank you for posting, it sounds like you are having a really tough time.
Remember none of this is your fault. Being forced or pressured to have sex when you don't want to is rape and it is a crime. There was nothing you could have done to prevent this.
If your partner tries to control you by checking your text messages and wants to know who you are with all the time, and isolates you from your friends you need to do something about it. This is controlling behaviour that can escalate from verbal and emotional abuse to physical violence. If your partner is extremely jealous and controlling this will have an impact on your mental and physical health. If their controlling behaviour gets worse you have to think about ending the relationship, but don’t confront them on your own.
It important that you try and find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and trust.
If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.
You can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call the National Domestic Violence Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge) 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm.
You can also speak to the police. Most police forces have specially trained police officers to help people who have been raped or sexually assaulted. You can contact the police immediately by dialling 999.
Ryan Clarke
03/04/2012
Loads of the story's on this sight are upsetting, and i agree on alot of the things 'Em' talked about, are these adverts just bringing back horrible memory's for loads of victims? and is it really going to make a differences to thows 'people' who are capable of Rape? maybe the advert should be how to avoid this situation, to be more careful about who you trust and not put yourself in a situation where your alone with someone, yes all situation are different so its hard to wright the answer in a comment or put the answer in a advert but like 'Em' Said are these adverts doing more good than bad? I would appreciated peoples view on this.
ReplyRyan Clarke - 03/04/2012
Em
03/04/2012
When I was 14 I was raped by an older boy who I thought loved me. This is a common story amongst many young people, however, I still feel that this ad campaign is completely unneccessary.
ReplyHumans can sense when another human is in distress. They know when they are doing something wrong. The coward who raped me did so despite seeing that my eyes were filled with tears. He did not need an advert to tell him that this is not acceptable behaviour.
After it happened, I was in a very dark place for a long long time. I am trying to leave it all behind me and move on, but it is difficult when I try to watch TV, or listen to music on Spotify, in the safety of my own home, just to be reminded of it by these disgusting adverts.
I am not exaggerating when I say that they have set me back so far that I have had to return to counselling sessions, which I thought I would never need again.
I do not think these adverts will make a jot of difference, all they do is hurt the victims. The whole campaign should be pulled.
Em - 03/04/2012
Jane
02/04/2012
I've just come out of a relationship with someone who I was with for a year and a half, on and off. I had just turned 16 when we started a relationship, he was nearly 19. He slept with someone within the first few months that we were together and I never got over it; yet I couldn't bring myself to leave him.
ReplyI loved him so much and I didn't really realise how bad our relationship was until now.
He would invite me round, barely speak to me and then beg for sex. I used to give in and then he would act like I wasn't there again once he had got what he wanted. He used to tell me that I had no friends, that all of his friends hated me and that I could never go out with him when he was with them, so we would barely go out together in public. He also told me frequently that I should wear less make up and less slutty clothes - although he said this, it was okay for me to dress slutty infront of him. He once even asked if my birthday present could be an outfit similar to the ones sold in Anne Summers. I knew our relationship was not healthy but I couldn't get out of it. I would wake up in the morning and he would be looking through my phone. He would tell me not to speak to certain people and would throw things around his room when he got angry. It seemed the worse he treated me, the more I wanted him.
He made me very insecure, to the extent that I believed that no-one else would want me. It was always me breaking up with him - and when I did, he would turn up to my house (uninvited) and beg for me back. One time he even threw himself on the floor. He used to swear at me, call me the c word and a slut yet he couldn't see a reason for me ending it.
I have not spoken to him for almost a month now, and I am finally getting over it.
Just wanted some feedback - what do you think of this relationship? It's not normal is it?
Jane - 02/04/2012
Hi Jane
This wasn't a normal relationship, it was an abusive relationship. Abusive behaviour doesn’t have to be physical, it can be emotional too which includes putting you down.
It’s good that you’re getting over it, but if you feel you’d benefit from talking to someone, you can call ChildLine on 0800 1111 or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call Women’s Aid on 0808 2000 247 (phone line run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge) or email them on helpline@womensaid.org.uk
02/04/2012
02/04/2012
Hi,
We are sorry to hear about this traumatic incident which happened in your past.
Being forced or pressured to have sex when you don’t want to is rape and it is a crime. Understand that this was not your fault. There was nothing you could have done to prevent this.
If this has happened to you no matter how long ago please try and find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and trust.
If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.
You can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call National Freephone Rape Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm.
lauren
31/03/2012
i will always remember the day i got draggd into the bushes in eastbourne park i was only 10 years of age and he was 19 or 20 the pain i will neverever foget that day 3 years on.....
Replylauren - 31/03/2012
sarah
25/03/2012
I was raped by a uncle at my nana's house on a weekly basis from the age of five to the age of eight when he died. He told me it was a secret & if I told I would be sent away for good.
ReplyHe would sit me on a big chair pull my pants down then rape me I hated every second of my life but all he could say to me is. Is it there yet. I'm now in my late fourtys av children & grandchild we DO NOT AV SECRETS in our family. I will never get over what happened to me
sarah - 25/03/2012
Hi Sarah,
Thanks for your post, and we're sorry you went through something so traumatic, the effects of which you still feel. We're also glad that you now have a loving and successful family life.
It's unclear whether you ever spoke to someone with experience of helping people who have been through abuse.
It may help to call National Freephone Rape Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm.
The Samaritans may also be able to help, take a look at their website at http://www.samaritans.org.uk/ or email jo@samaritans.co.uk. You can also call the Samaritans helpline on 08457 909090.
me
24/03/2012
I was 14 going out with a guy a year older. We had just broken up and were going bowling with a group of mates. I agreed to meet him before going. It was raining so we went back to his place and just chilled. I went to leave so that we weren't late and he pushed me up against the wall wanting second base.
ReplyI was like are you mad no. he said nothing and undid my trousers. Yeah that happened and we went to the bowling thing. I was all in shock and to make it worse, he asked out another girl infront of me that night. felt used completey used. I'm 17 now, and he is one sorry guy. Never trusted a man so easily since.
me - 24/03/2012
My aunt used to abuse me when I was just 6 anytime she is preparing me for school. Now am 35 its made me see women as terrible set of creatures
Akpan - 29/03/2012
leonnie
24/03/2012
hey i think its sick
Replyleonnie - 24/03/2012
Ryn
22/03/2012
From the age of 13 till 23 I stayed with the same guy. The first time he hit me I was 15, it was my fault ( he told me that so I believed him, stupidly) from that point on it went downhill. Where was I going? Who was I seeing? I lost most of my friends, didn't finish college, wore dowdy clothes. According to him I was lucky that he loved me, as I was fat and stupid and no one else would ever love me. My parents tried so hard to like him but they could see that I was changing in front of them, I lost weight, became withdrawn, and felt like crap. After almost 10 years of verbal, physical and emotional abuse I found out that he'd been cheating on me, the following day quite by chance I met a very old school friend we had a coffee and it poured out, everything! She knew from school what had been happening and even spoken to a teacher but was told it was a childhood crush and it'd all be fine, she'd even tried talking to him when we were aged 14 and he'd threatened her so she backed off. I walked away from him that night and never looked back. Where my strength came from I don't know.
ReplyTo all the people out there you can walk away, it seems hopeless right now but be sure you will be ok. I've been there on the darkest side but the sun comes out everyday. 15 years later I'm in the best place and you will be too x
Ryn - 22/03/2012
NoOne
22/03/2012
When I was 13 I went out with this boy he was 2 years older and he was very controlve. I didn't like how he would push me around and feel like I would to anything, he was so lovely and different at first but then he became very rude. I went to his for the first time to meet his parents and he put me in his room, at first it was cool we watched a nice film and then he pulled his trousers down then mine, he made me do a lot of things I wasnt comfortbal with and I think he raped me but that was about a year ago and it is making the relationship I'm in now awkward, what shall I do?
ReplyNoOne - 22/03/2012
anon
22/03/2012
well i have a friend and she always goes out wiv loads of boys im scared that she will get hurt like the people in the video she is 14 and she is now going out wiv a 17yr old
Replyanon - 22/03/2012
Anon
20/03/2012
I'm in a relationship now, we were going well for 8 months, the night I told him I loved him, we were kissing on my bed, and he started touching me, I wasn't w virgin, but it was hurting, he was grabbing me and slapping me, I kept saying no but eventually it hurt and I just let him, is this rape?
ReplyAnon - 20/03/2012
Hi Anon,
Thanks for posting.
Being forced or pressured to have sex against your will is rape and it is a crime. Understand that this was not your fault. There was nothing you could have done to prevent this. If this has happened to you, try and find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and trust.
If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.
You can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call National Freephone Rape Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm.
You can also speak to the police. Most police forces have specially trained police officers to help people who have been raped or sexually assaulted. You can contact the police immediately by dialling 999.
Asienna
20/03/2012
Im 16 and i was in a strange relationship. Me and this guy were getting to know eachother and stuff and i went round to his house he hard a small party and there was a lot of drink he kept giving me beer and then handed me a bottle of brandy and dared me to drink it all as i was quite tipsy i stupidly said yeah. After that i cant remember what happened, even today i really cant. All i remember was waking up with my top inside out and my underwear on the floor and i asked him what happened and he said we had had sex, and i thought he was kidding i didnt believe him because i really couldnt remember and i kept thinking i would know because my body would feel different. Turns out we did have sex and i had a huggee carpet burn on my back as proof. I told a my friend this and he said that it was date rape and the he took advantage of me. Could i have other peoples opinions, Baring in mind i only knew the guy for two weeks and i was never going to sleep with him at all. Ide just got out of a two year relationship which was very hard. Help pleasee!! Any thoughts at all i wont get offended
ReplyAsienna - 20/03/2012
Sorry to hear that Asienna, hope you recover from that... Thank God it didn't happen to me.
Mog - 12/04/2012
dear asienna,
i wouldnt understand your situation but i suggest you get an opinion from someone who knows you and you can trust
but from the way you speak it seems your unsure and thus embarassed if thats the case please you need to speak to someone close to you...let it not take a toll on you...
maria - 24/03/2012
Ab
20/03/2012
i was 15 when i was in a relationship were my boyfriend was controlling me. At the time i didnt realize he was controlling me i just thought he was being nice, he would do things around the house to help my mum, i was really close to my antie and he would keep going down there when i was at school/college slowly all my faimly i was really close to was gone.When i would go out shopping with my mum he would be constantly ringing me saying when will i be back hurry im missing you (only missing shouting at me) when i would get home i would go round to his house and he would say youv not been shopping with your mum youv been with another boy. I only had a few really close friends but it was like if they wasnt his friend then they couldnt be my friend.
Replyon diffrent ocations he would tickle and pinch me hard to leave bruises i would tell him to stop it is hurting he wouldnt stop, avencully when he did stop i would say i told you to stop you was hurting and he would just reply SHUT UP I WAS ONLY MESSING. I hated wearing short sleeved tops because my arms were coved in bruises.One morning i was at his house an we was having a fall out and he pushed me onto his bed and put his hand over my mouth clenched his fist and went to punch me, if it wasnt for his mum coming upstairs then he would have hit me. I ran out of the room sobing i sat on the bottom of his stairs crying a few minutes later he came down i was shacking when he touched me he saaid he was sorry and that he wouldnt have hit me i had ust made him very angry.He would call me fat when ever i ate(ONLY JOKING), if i didnt want to eat he would shout GET YOUR DINNER EATEN YOUR MUM HAS MADE IT FOR YOU.
Three years later i realized what he was doing. One night he rang me and told me he was seeing some1 else. I thought to myself well i cant take this anymore so i just said very carm ok then its over leave it at that and put the phone down. He rang me back so i answerd and said i was just joking (TIPICAL) but i knew i couldnt take it any more. I left my phone at home while i went to ork the next day i came home and i had 50 miss calls i just ignored every call he would ring my house phone to.
For my 18th birthday i had a car and he rang me while i was at college i reseved a text from him saying move your car quickly because, a girl who i didnt get o with at school is going to comee and smash it up. He would text me and say he was at my college. Even know we have been split up 6 months he is still going in my local pub so i dont go in there now. I am in another relationship now and i have lernt from my mistakes and i will never be doing it agen.
Ab - 20/03/2012
I think its disugusting how guys think they can do this to girls its just wrong its sound like you put up with alot its your choice but if he still continues to harasse you the call the Police and notify them. I hope you got it sorted! take care x
Callum - 31/03/2012
Anonymous
18/03/2012
When I was 15 I was in a relationship where my boyfriend was controlling, He hated my friends and would get angry with me if he wanted to see me and I was spending time with them.
ReplyWhen we hung out with his friends, they would constantly pick on me for being "emo" and he would often join in. He pressured me into a lot of stuff and if I didn't want to do sexual stuff with him, he would "pleasure" me and then tell me that I had to do stuff for him, because now I owed him for what he just did for me.
I eventually broke up with him when he tried to stop me from visiting my mum in hospital because he thought I was cheating on him when I said I was going to visit her. I broke up with him nearly 5 years ago and I am still trying to deal with the insecurities that he left me with.
I wish I had gotten out sooner, because something as small as what he used to do has really messed me up.
Anonymous - 18/03/2012
The same happened to me when I was 14-15. I'm 18 now and I still havn't gotten over it. I'm very insecure and don't trust anyone. My relationships with everyone have never been the same. I still see him around and it kills me.
The worst thing is is that he sent me texts admitting what he did was both sexual and emotional abuse and I've been told he has done it too another girl recently. Do I tell someone or not? Please help.
Anon - 23/03/2012
hello, i wanted to say the same things has happen to me, i was 14,
xx
Anonymous - 19/03/2012
ANON
17/03/2012
My situation is abit similar, I thaught i was in love with a boy who was 16, i was 14. It was at school., We were hugging and then he started touching me on my bum, i went along with it. Then he went down the frount of my trousers.. Is this rape?
ReplyANON - 17/03/2012
you are 14, at this age any sexual touching is classed as rape, more so if you did not want it. if he was over 16 (which i understand he was probably not, then it would be statutory rape even if you said yes) if he is under 16, lets say he is 14 like yourself, then it IS RAPE if you did not feel comfortable, or said no... you dont have to say ''no'' to a guy for it to be rape, as long as you did not willingly (without being forced) say YES.
then it is rape,... rape itself does not need ''penetration'' it can be any form of sexual abuse, (touching, forcing any kind of sexual act on you, and forcing you to do any sexual act for him) get some help if you feel you need to.
dan - 29/03/2012
Its not rape but if he is touching you in areas where you don't want to be touched tell him to back off. Set the boundaries its your body and you decide how you want it to be treated not his
Hope this helped :)
Ife - 23/03/2012
sorry but this isnt rape at all, yeah it could be sexual assult, however if you went along with it, how was he going to know that you didnt want it also the police wont be able to help you if you didnt say no when he was touching you.
sophs - 19/03/2012
kind of. If you went along with it for him touching your bum ok not rape but if you didint want him touching the front of you trousers thats rape .
me - 18/03/2012
hannah
17/03/2012
no girl should go thew that if a girl say no it mean no she ent ready you should have respect for that like am not ready am only 14 and seen that girl face she was so scared she was about to cry no girl should go thew that its not right
Replyhannah - 17/03/2012
Lauren
17/03/2012
It was a while ago now but i remember one of my ex's used to tell me how to dress and what he did or didn't like me to do, it did upset me mentally until me and my parents finally got sick of him, now hes out of my life, and the only reason why is because i knew i was strong enough to take control, don't be afraid to talk to people, whomever it may be, because it will help one way or another :)
ReplyLauren - 17/03/2012
Jay
17/03/2012
in all fairness, its a very very small minority of lads that are like this. And they are an absolute joke.
ReplyJay - 17/03/2012
this is true, other muppets just give the overall boys a bad name, we're not all like that, i've been with my girlfriend for over a year now n we're both happy :)
Random - 29/03/2012
Sarah
16/03/2012
This may sound silly and it's hard to put, but... Is it rape if you make it clear to someone that you don't want to have sex and they do it very slyly so that you wasn't aware and their reason was 'I knew that once I did it you wouldn't care anymore' ..? Wb
ReplySarah - 16/03/2012
Yes it is. Any form of deceit to get sex is rape.
Anonymous - 19/03/2012
Tsu
14/03/2012
This has always been my biggest fear. Maybe because of that I've always known I would never be abused by anyone. I know my rights and my place, and nobody will try to drag me away from them. On the other hand, it infuriates me how people can have such a low self-steem that they accept this kind of treatment; but not only the one in the video: as said before, it starts as something much softer, harder to identify, but still visible! And that's the right moment to confront the abusive one. "I won't stand anything like -whatever have you the clue-" Girls, boys, define your limits early, and don't ever let anyone trespass them. And if you don't see the initial signs, for God's sake, don't ever let anybody put a finger on you. That's the last step, and under no circumstances it should be allowed. Peace!
ReplyTsu - 14/03/2012
RB
06/03/2012
I'm 25 now but when I was 16 I went out for a guy for a long time who abused me. When we started going out I was very innocent and incredibly shy. This is something I now believe he took advantage of.
ReplyI never said anything verbally to him about what I did and didn't want, and so he never undermined me by using any words like 'frigid' as shown in these videos...but he would get drunk and force himself on me and hurt me. Because I never actually said anything to him - I never told him to stop, I never told him he was hurting me - I believed it was then my fault because if I didn't say anything how would he know and therefore how could he be blamed for hurting me like that?
I think it's also really important to focus on more subtle forms of abuse like this. It's very clear in situations, as depicted in these adverts, where someone is clearly saying they don't want to do something or someone is clearly using language to damage self esteem. However, there are many young people who are not confident enough to express themselves so clearly and it's important to let them know that situations like mine are abusive too and that just because you don't say no it doesn't mean it is automatically your fault and it doesn't take blame away from the other person.
RB - 06/03/2012
benson
05/03/2012
This is terrible,but we just av 2 accept it dat way.
Replybenson - 05/03/2012
we don't have to accept it...life shouldn't be filled with fear! rape is sick and wrong.
josie - 17/03/2012
how would can i anyone possibly accept that?! its sick and its wrong!!
Jay - 17/03/2012
No benson, we don't have to accept it. This campaign is about educating young people not to accept being treated badly.
Jessie - 07/03/2012
Meg
08/02/2012
this is abuse and isn't a healthy relationship. you will be so much happier away from the relationship, there is no talking through things with a controller like this, be strong and walk away it may hurt but it will be better for you in the long run. take care xxx
ReplyMeg - 08/02/2012
Anon
05/02/2012
I have a boyfriend who checks up on me all the time, often gets very jealous, I am scared of what to say around him and often delete posts on facebook incase they make him angry/jealous. Is this controlling? I never realised it was but recently I have only just noticed how he will ring me constantly if I don't answer straight away. However, he has never hit me or got very angry, he will usually cry until he gets his own way. I tried to finish the relationship but he got my friends involved, cried and begged me not to leave him and he wouldn't stop contacting me constantly. Is it me being silly, I just don't know?
ReplyAnon - 05/02/2012
Hi Anon. Thank you for getting in touch. Please find someone to talk to about your boyfriends controlling behaviour, you should not have to suffer like this and it is important you try to get some help.
If you are finding it hard to speak to someone about this you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call Women’s Aid on 0808 2000 247, or email them on helpline@womensaid.org.uk, the website is http://www.womensaid.org.uk/
Sadie
12/01/2012
Abusive should have been dealt with ages ago. Especially in teenage realationships. I hope I don't experience stuff like this, and I hope others won't let it happen to them.
ReplySadie - 12/01/2012
justin kitto
24/12/2011
abuse bad man worse for girls need more sites to help
Replyjustin kitto - 24/12/2011
anon
22/12/2011
i think this video is too obvious it starts of far more subtl than this
Replyanon - 22/12/2011
A guy who hates abuse
22/12/2011
I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for just under 3 years, i can't understand how any bloke could do stuff like that to a girl, never mind their girlfriend who their meant to love. I've always spoiled my girlfriend, never hurt her, short of accidentally pulling her hair with when its caught on my watch and i feel dreadful for that, i cant imagine how id feel if i meant to hurt her. Any blokes watching this if you know your friend is abusing his girlfriend or even boyfriend, don't stand for it. but also any girls watching this thinking oh only blokes are abusive, that's utter rubbish, i have friends who have been in a relationship where if they don't do what their girlfriend wants they would through tantrums, one of my mates has lost the use of his left eye because his girlfriend threw a glass vase at him because he went to a party without asking her to come with him.
ReplyA guy who hates abuse - 22/12/2011
I completely agree with this. My boyfriend has exactly the same opinions like this,he's a very kind and sweet guy, I used to be in a abusive relationship,with hitting, name calling and abuse sexually.. I'm still getting over things and trying to rebuild my self esteem again,and having such an amazing guy like him by my side is wonderful.
Roxy - 19/03/2012
Pixie
21/12/2011
I was once in an abusive relationship. I met him in college through friends and within two weeks we had hit it off. Within a month we were convinced we were in love. I'm a straight A student who has just gained a place at Oxford (last week, hooray!) and he was at first proud of me and eager to show off his 'clever girlfriend' to all his friends. However, the honeymoon period soon faded when he started pressurizing me to have sex and do things I was uncomfortable with. "But if you loved me you would..." was a constant refrain. Eventually I gave in because I believed he loved me. All this time he had been becoming more and more controlling and obsessed with my whereabouts. He would obsessively check my texts, demand to know where I was and who I was with and soon it became a case of 'you have to stay home or we're over.' The worst came in the new year when he started to hit me and physically force me to do things. Friends asked me about bruises, about why they hadn't seen me for a fortnight or more. I lied. I felt so alone.
ReplyBUT you can get out. There's a happy end to my story. My friends didn't support me, but thankfully I was blessed with a loving mother who did, and just before my 17th birthday, I escaped. I got great grades and I've got great university prospects now. There can be a happy ending, so get out. I guarantee you it will hurt less being without them than with them in this kind of hell.
My thoughts are with you all,
Pixie x
Pixie - 21/12/2011
Anonymous
19/12/2011
This video has always really scared me but i think it is really good how people have the heart to make a video to help others
ReplyAnonymous - 19/12/2011
danielle and chloe
18/12/2011
well i would keep on going because he can get done for abuse
Replydanielle and chloe - 18/12/2011
Anon
14/12/2011
i have been in a relationship like this in the past, so i can really relate to this however he was physically and mentally violent to me, i used to hang on to every word he said and believe everything he said. he made me feel really small and that i wasnt worth anything, he used to call me a slut and that i was ugly and how i should be grateful to be with him because no body else wanted to be with me. I knew deep down he was wrong but i felt like i was nothing without him and i thought tht if i lost him i would be nobody even though it was him that cheated on me he was violent towards me and manipulated me.I finally got out after he was convicted of assult and even a couple of years down the line i have nothing to do with him but if i do see him i feel he still has this control over me and i dont know if he will ever completely be out of my life even though he has no contact over me.
ReplyAnon - 14/12/2011
Thank you for commenting Anon. Help and support is out there. You could talk to someone you trust. That could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and trust.
You can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call Women’s Aid on 0808 2000 247, or email them on helpline@womensaid.org.uk
Girl
12/12/2011
Hello, i have been in an abusive relationship for over 3 years. by abusive, i mean that he scares me, he swears at me, he uses words i've never even thought about before. he makes me feel tiny. he hurts me physically, emotionally and psychologically. I'm hurt. what hurts the most is trying to confront him. because i am, and always will be wrong. no matter how good or kind i try to be, i always fail. I'm alone. but i know one day i will be stronger and be out of where i am now. don't ever let any one, not even the person u think u love the most, ever hurt you. you are too good to be hurt. as soon as something is wrong, the guy is too over you, jealous, over protective, disrespectful,nasty,rude and brutal, don't do this to your self. i learned how it feels to be appreciated, and the feeling is so nice and pure. without anyone being hurt.
ReplyGirl - 12/12/2011
Noone should suffer from emotional and physical abuse (which can include someone putting you down, or calling you nasty names, trying to control you and stopping you doing certain things or making you do things you don’t want to do). Try and find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and trust.
If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.
You can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call Women’s Aid on 0808 2000 247, or email them on helpline@womensaid.org.uk
Jess
12/12/2011
This is horrible...I would like to think that if I am ever in her situation I would know how to stop it.
ReplyJess - 12/12/2011
Megan
11/12/2011
This Is So Wrong I Feel So Sorry For Her
ReplyMegan - 11/12/2011
Morgan
10/12/2011
I dont think this goes on much where i live, it's pretty quiet and everyone here is reasonably polite. The only people who would be abusive are complete idiots. It's not a relationship, if you're not nice to one and another.
ReplyMorgan - 10/12/2011
Anonymous1234
06/12/2011
i can relate to what you've been through.. but i was pressured into having sex.. turned out i was never loved
ReplyAnonymous1234 - 06/12/2011
iv'e never told anyone the full extent, but i was pressured a lot in my past. i was pressured into sex, which became so painful that it was unbearable. soon after it started, i was pressured into other things too, and i ended up having to force him off of me on several occasions. the people i have told some of this to haven't taken it seriously simply because he has ADHD (which i found out about after all of this). I do believe that this can have an affect on how people view things, but no matter how severe the ADHD, people should know their right from wrong.
sofie - 18/03/2012
chris
05/12/2011
this is too right, the amount of people i have known be hurt from these kinda things, i dont know anyone get hit before mind, but still being made upset by their partner bein made to feel down.. this is something that does need to be sorted out and it can come from both the guys and the girls it aint just guys this is something that people dont actually look at properly they just think oh hes bein a p*^%( dump him, they dont realise how complicated these things can get i think everyone should take the time to look at this issue cos if they did then people might think better about relationships, i know i do ive had to sit and try and deal with abuse coming my way before luckily i ended it before it got to me any more than it did, yh i think everyone should take the time to look at this definately.
Replychris - 05/12/2011
I totally agree with you here, I know that people always think that it is the guys being macho and abusive (physically) but it can also be the girls who either hit or make their partner feel worthless. its a double edged blade to be honest because the abuser gains nothing from doing it and will ruin the special connection that the two individuals share.
Jay - 06/12/2011
34567
05/12/2011
ReplyThis forum should be about helping women who are being abused, not about turning it around and saying what about the men. Male abuse by women is very rare. Its largely an issue of physical strength as the strongest women (assuming she has no special training) will always be weaker than the weakest man. Male abuse does deserve an airing but in its own segment, as the circumstances are very different from female abuse. Concentrate on this very important issue, there are hundreds of thousands of women suffering abuse in this country alone
actually the number of males been abused is probably not far of the number of women been abused IT IS NOT a matter of physical strengh alone in the case of men there is alot lesser a number of physicall abuse but emotional abuse is still a at a high number also emotional abuse is alot more painful and can scare you on the inside for alot longer then been punched ect.. as much as i do agree that they should be places for all women help i already know they is quite a large number of such places they however isnt as many places for men this is because most males are ashamed to come looking for help they feel it makes them look week and as for this site they have done ads in both situations with men and women been abused in the past this site is not intended for one sex it is purely to express your opinons and experiances to try encourage people of both sexes to come forward and get help and to help them have a happy futur
34567 - 05/12/2011
laura
04/12/2011
oh yes it must be so difficult to abuse someone, quick idea dont do it:L it wrecks lifes i know it does!
Replylaura - 04/12/2011
Jerry
03/12/2011
You are so wrong! Abuse is bad! No one brings it on themselves! Abusers need to take responsibility for their criminal behaviour, get help if they need to, and just stop abusing. Simple! They will be happier when they do. Being an abuser does not make you happy!
ReplyJerry - 03/12/2011