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This is ABUSE

Help uscall outabuse

Zoe's story

  • Sex with someone who doesn't want to is rape
  • Abuse in relationships isn’t always physical
  • Would you recognise abuse if you saw it?
  • Emotional Abuse
  • Controlling Behaviour
  • SPOT THE SIGNS OF ABUSE IN A FRIEND’S RELATIONSHIP
  • Mandem On The Wall
  • Twist and Pulse
  • Charlie McDonnell
  • Bedroom
  • Liam & Beth - Recognise abuse when you see it
  • Ryan & Jade - Recognise abuse when you see it
  • Sam & Alice
  • If you could see yourself
  • Party
  • School
  • Takeaway

Sex with someone who doesn't want to is rape.

what do you think? share your opinions

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Results: 1 - 15 of 541

  • Meg

    02/11/2014

    At halloween I went to the disco with some of my friends, I was the only girl and there is a boy in my group and he likes me and I like him so his cousin was talking to me about him in private, and he was forcing me to touch him and he kept on wanting to touch me and kiss me I kept on telling him no and I tried to get him off but I couldn't. I haven't told anyone yet. Was he abusing me??

    Reply

    Meg - 02/11/2014

    • Hi there

      Thanks for your post. If you’ve been forced or pressured to have sex, or take part in sexual activity that you didn’t feel comfortable with, that is totally unacceptable, no one should be putting you in that position. Please understand that what happened was not your fault and there was nothing you could have done to prevent it, don’t blame yourself.

      If you are unsure, examples of sexual abuse or assault can include being touched in a sexual way that makes you feel uncomfortable or frightened (this can be through clothes or not), being forced to watch others engage in sexual activity, being pressured to send naked pictures of yourself, sexting and being made to stimulate yourself or others.

      If this has happened to you, we would always encourage you to try and find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable talking to. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. And if they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and happy, and help and support is out there.

      If you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem, nothing is too big or small for them. They won’t judge you; they will listen, advise and guide you. Or alternatively you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      If you’re over 18, you can call the National Freephone Rape Crisis Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999, 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm. They offer counselling and support for women who have experienced any form of sexual violence, not just rape.

      Also remember that if you have been sexually assaulted you can speak to the police. Most police forces have specially trained police officers who can help. If you ever feel that you are in immediate danger, call the police on 999.

      We hope this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team


      This Is Abuse team 05/11/2014

  • Iman

    30/09/2014

    My friend was raped. She had been in a casual intimte relationship with someone and was spending time with him and some friends at a forest, camping when another friend had approached her and tried to kiss her. she had told him no, and that she didnt want it to happen and extricated herself from the situation but later on, she was with the boy she had been having a casual sexual relationship with (she had also secretly developed feelings for him) when the friend joined in. having already said no, she didnt know what else to do, and not wanting to cause a fuss, especially when he was meant to be a friend - a safe zone and he kept trying to convince her it was okay by using her own morals against her saying 'you should understand, you care about peace and love, this is peace and love' etc. weve since spoken about it and are discussing legal options and getting help groups but what concerns me is that when i was spending time with another of the guys in that group of friend he too tried to convince me and playfully force me into having sex with him. I kept saying no and telling him to stop and avoid certain areas but he just said calm down and its okay and to relax, and i could tell that he didnt realise what he was doing. i didnt give in but if he was with someone else who didnt have the energy or stubbornness or stregnth to go the whole night saying no then that person may have been raped but he wouldnt know what hed done wrong. unless youre kicking and screaming it seems people this youre playing a game. i knew he didnt realise what he was trying to do to me so i dont want to hold it against him as a person because he does have a good heart but i think people need to be educated to know that its not okay. when someone says no, they should have to be screaming and crying for you to listen. if you say no then its not your fault. i want to be able to explain to him what he did as wrong but it was a little while ago and we still have a good friendship because i understand that it was ignorance not a bad intention, but he and that group of friends dont seem to understand that and i feel like it could be the case for a lot of people. i had to use all my stregnth to stop him from playfully going to far simply because he was naturally a lot stronger than me. i want to educate hem but i dont know how to without causing tensions and ruining friendships..

    Reply

    Iman - 30/09/2014

    • Hi Iman,
      Thanks for your message. I am sorry to hear what you and your friend have been through. You are right that people need a lot more education about healthy and respectful relationships - especially around sex and consent. But, what they did was still abuse and illegal and you were both very clear that you did not want to do anything.
      I am glad that you are talking to your friend about the options. If you want some more advice or support you can talk confidentially to rape crisis - they can help you, advise you on what would happen if you did report to the police and also tell you about the services in your area. http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/
      0808 802 9999

      It's very important that your friend gets some support as rape is incredibly traumatic and can have long lasting impacts. You may also benefit from talking to someone about what you experienced.

      I understand you want to give these guys the benefit of the doubt and be friends still but I am concerned about this. Please try not to be on your own with them and tell someone if anything like this happens again. You can always call the police if you feel scared.

      Take care
      Jo

      This is Abuse team - 08/12/2014

  • Lme

    29/09/2014

    I think it's disgusting the amount of males who believe they have an entitlement to anyone they want. It seems to be heriditory, as though they inherit some sort of sexism from their parents or perhaps just the underlying sexism in society? Mortifying what ever the case

    Reply

    Lme - 29/09/2014

  • Anji

    03/04/2014

    There's a boy in my school, and he's been touching up my best friend. He touched me up several months ago too, but I was too scared to tell anyone, because of how they might react, and that it might get around. But anyway, he's been touching up my best friend, and she's finally found the nerve to confide in me, but she hates it. She's like most other teenagers, she likes to make jokes and other mild sexual puns, but when it comes to the real thing - she's terrified. I've kept my eye on when they hug, and I refuse to allow them privacy, because of what might happen. He even did it to her when I was in the room, but couldn't see them. I've been trying to distract her from being too upset by making her laugh and the small things like buying little gifts and snacks for her, and talking to her about family life, but i'm worried that if i fall ill for a few days, if they're alone for a while then she might actually get raped. My other best friend was raped as a child, and she suffers from severe depression, multiple personality disorders and other psychological issues, and as an early teen I was molested by 2 boys in my old school. I have emotional detatchment issues, so i'm not too bothered about myself, but I have great concern for my school friend, as she's the most timid girl i've ever met, and I want to protect her, as she's been through plenty in her life as it is. I'm too scared to report it, as the police may become involved, yet I can't be with her 24/7 to keep an eye out and I want to know that she's safe.

    Reply

    Anji - 03/04/2014

    • HI Anji,

      Thanks for getting in touch. It sounds like you and your friends have all been through a really tough time. It must be really hard. It's really important that you understand that this is not your fault, and the men that have acted in this way are responsible for this behaviour and what they are doing is wrong and illegal. Therefore they could be punished by the Police as that is the right thing to do.

      I am concerned for you, and your two friends who have all been through awful ordeals. I think it would be really helpful for you all to talk to somebody in your school about what has been happening.

      There is a lot of information on this website which could be really helpful for you and your friends to read. My concern is that you are not very well supported, and are therefore at more risk. I really would recommend speaking to somebody at school, or to an adult that you trust.

      You can also speak to Childline on 0800 1111, or talk to us on Live Chat on our Website Monday to Friday 5pm until 7pm.

      Take care,

      Luke

      This is Abuse team - 04/04/2014

  • emily

    15/03/2014

    i was in a relationship with my boyfriend, he was the most amazing thing that had ever happened to me . i loved him a lot and i mean a lot , after 2 months he started to tell me what to wear , what to do , he was controlling me . when i ever said no to hi he would get very angry and punch,kick,spit,and leave bruises and multiple scarthes on my body . thats not all . when i was with hi i was a virgin only 17 years old he was 19 , he wasnt a virgin and i was , he asked for sex and i said no , he ripped my skirt and underwear , looked in to my eyes , i knew something was wrong , he then started to cry and said im srry i have to do this , he ripped my top and took his penis out , right now i was panicking because i had never done this , ..... he raped me . after he was done he told me that he loved me i didnt say a word he picked me up and placed me in the bath and put the shwer on he gave me a shower , after that he went out to get me flowers and chocolates i didnt say anything , but deep down in my heart i still loved him .after a year we split up .

    Reply

    emily - 15/03/2014

    • Hi Emily
      Thank you for your message.
      It sounds like your relationship was incredibly abusive. I am very glad you are no longer with him, but I want to check you are safe now. Do you have any contact with him now?
      Have you had any support to cope with what happened? Abuse and rape can have long lasting impacts and it is important to talk about it and get help.
      If you want to talk more to us, we have a live chat service every mon-fri between 5-7pm.
      You can also contact rape crisis - http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/
      freephone helpline
      0808 802 9999
      12 - 2.30pm
      7 - 9.30pm

      or the national domestic abuse helpline on 0808 2000 247.
      You are not alone and deserve support,
      take care
      Jo

      This is Abuse team - 19/03/2014

  • Michael

    11/03/2014

    I have this friend who went out with this guy over a year and 8 months, in the last few months I found out what he was going and I've known while they've been going out, but she asked me not to doing anything, even though I had her in tears and her ex boyfriend was raping her while she was sleeping taking her clothes of as well, she woke up and was acting like she was still asleep as she was so scared. Even through the day if he wanted sex and she didn't he would pin her down to her own bed and flip her over on to her stomach and rape her that way, she put up with a fight to get him of her and he used all he strength and pinned her, leaving her marks all over her arms. I would have her in tears every night when he wasn't at hers. He'd even put his down her bra while I was with them and he completely controlled her. Now she not with him she so scared he'd come back for more... When they broke up, she asked him why did he rape her and all he said was that there sex life was going down. She in a new relationship, but she jumps everytime she gets touched and she breaks down, she hasn't been to the police as she scared of what they're saying and what her family will say! Her ex has been trying to get with an underage girl but she warned her and she backed off but since she came out of the relationship she been so scared and she feels like she dirty, worthless and not even worth being here, she 19 and she got with him at 17. She needs advice as she really scared about going to the police.

    Reply

    Michael - 11/03/2014

    • Hi Michael,
      Thanks for your message. I’m sorry to hear that your friend has suffered such a traumatic experience. Many victims of rape do not speak out or are reluctant to discuss what they have experienced as they fear that they will not be believed. Your friend needs to be reminded that everyone has the right to say no to sex, even when in relationships.
      It is important that you continue offering her your support and remind her that this is not her fault. The blame lies entirely with her ex-boyfriend. Your friend must be the one to make the decision whether she reports the rapes. I would suggest your friend contacts www.rapecrisis.org.uk or call them on 0808 802 9999 (12-2.30pm, 7-9.30pm) they can offer support and advice.
      Take care
      Sarah

      This is Abuse team 12/03/2014

  • Anonymous

    05/03/2014

    I had been split up from my ex for about 5months, I had moved into a flat on my on. He turned up one night & barged his way in. He started to try it on but I told him no, I was seeing someone else. He wasn't happy at this and pinned me too the sofa, his hand round my neck, he threw my phone across the room so I could not reach it. He eventually left without much else happening. This happened another couple of times in the following months. Then in the early hours of he turned up again throwing stuff at my window to get my attention then threatening to smash my car up. So I opened the door & he pushed past me. That night it didn't stop at him holding me down by the throat, that night he raped me. After he left I carried on as normal, had my shower and went to work. I can't go to the police because I know what will happen. My friends know & I recently told my sister, but I don't want to talk about it. I live in a small town so I see him now & again but this wkend I was out for a friends birthday only to discover he is now working in my local

    Reply

    Anonymous - 05/03/2014


    • Thank you for your message. You have gone through something really traumatic and frightening. It takes a lot of courage to share that and reach out for support. You don’t have to cope with this without support, there are places out there you can talk to.

      What happened to you was as serious crime and was not your fault. Your ex attacked you and you now have to see him around where you live. It sounds like this is making things really hard and you are frightened to get support as he is still in the same town as you. You say you cannot go to the police because you know what will happen. Are you frightened he will attack you again?
      It sounds like you have support around you from your family and friends. That’s good, as you do not have to cope with this on your own. However I would encourage you to call Rape Crisis, they are an organisation who specialise in working with women and girls who have suffered sexual violence and trauma. They can talk with her in a confidential and non-judgemental setting. You can reach them on 0808 802 (12 –2.30 & 7 – 9.30 everyday). They will be able to listen to you and discuss with you options to assist you in your recovery and support in your local area.

      You have been through something really serious and you deserve support. We also have a live chat 5-7 weeknights if you would like to talk with one of our advisors and get some more support here.

      Take care,

      Becca

      This is Abuse team 05/03/2014

  • Emmy

    05/03/2014

    My girlfriend for 2years was raped last month by her male friend. She was a virgin before she was raped because we were planning to make love after marriage, but learning that she was raped by a trusted friend. Please, what can i do? She is currently depressed about it.

    Reply

    Emmy - 05/03/2014

    • Hi Emmy,

      Thanks for getting in touch. It sounds like it is a really tough time for her, and what she will need at the moment is for you to be supportive. She has to choose at what pace she wants to do things, and there are lots of services out there that can help her.

      Firstly, she might want to consider reporting what happened to the Police. The man who has done this should be held accountable for his actions.

      Secondly, I would recommend contacting Rape Crisis on 0808 802 9999. They offer an advice line for women who have experienced sexual abuse and rape. They will be able to talk her through her options as well as put her in contact with some local services that will be able to support her.

      She might also want to talk to her GP about what has happened, the GP may be able to assist with the current depression.

      Again, these are all options that she has to choose from, but ultimately it is her choice to make.

      Take care,

      Luke

      This is Abuse team - 06/03/2014

  • jon

    27/02/2014

    my partner was in a very abusive relationship b4 we met he use to beat her put her in hospital many times she finally got out but it really dented her confidence when we got together ittook a long time to earn her trust but i may have blow it because the other day i was bending over bed and she give me a wack on bum in shock i spun round waving my hand and caught her i feel reel bad because of it

    Reply

    jon - 27/02/2014

    • Dear Jon,
      Thank you for your message. It’s a brave thing to post here about feeling that you have hurt your partner. I understand you are feeling bad about what happened, but for her it would have been a very frightening thing to experience.
      You can call the Respect phone line on 9898 802 40 40 Monday – Friday (9-5) if you are worried about your behaviour towards your partner. It is a confidential helpline where you can talk about how you re feeing about the incident.
      Take care,
      Becca

      This is Abuse team 28/02/2014

  • Faye

    25/02/2014

    Hi, I was hoping for some advice. About two and a half years ago I was drugged and raped by a stranger. It was a very tough time in my life and I suffered Ptsd for quite some time. Luckily now im well over it after much counselling and have now met a lovely guy and we have been dating for 8 months. I love him dearly. However recently a few issues arised about things sexually and I felt that I had to tell him to let him understand why I am a bit withdrawn in regards to being intimate. I felt better talking to him about it and getting it off my chest. But now I think he hasnt taken it too well and he said he was upset by it. I have asked him to keep it to himself as obviously this isn't something I would like people to know. I just feel a bit confused as how to broach the whole thing. Talking about it does upset me still but I dont want him looking at me with pity. Please help if you can. Thank you xx

    Reply

    Faye - 25/02/2014

    • Dear Faye,

      Thank you for your message. I can hear how hard it was for you to share what happened to you with your partner, and how much work you have done in your recovery.

      You experienced something really traumatic and took so many steps to help you recover. You have now shared this with your partner and he was upset. That’s hard for you as now you feel like you need to protect his feelings, when you are the person that deserves support as you have been through a lot and survived that.

      You are frightened he will look at you with pity, but you are not to be pittied as you have been strong in your recovery. Have you been able to talk through your feelings about this with anyone else in your life, such as a trusted friend or family member? If not maybe you could talk this through with someone such as Rape Crisis You can reach them on 0808 802 9999 (12-2.30pm, 7-9:30pm). The helpline is strictly confidential and they will be a good place for you to explore how you feel about telling your boyfriend and how you can manage the feelings it brings up for you.

      If you would like to discuss this more we have a live chat weeknights 5-7.
      Take care,
      Becca

      This is Abuse team 27/02/2014

  • Kim

    23/02/2014

    Needing a step in the right direction,a close 14 year old has confided in me..they need help after abuse,I don't know how to go about getting some form of confidential counselling arranged can anyone help please? X

    Reply

    Kim - 23/02/2014

    • Hi Kim
      It is great that someone felt they could confide in you, but I know it can be hard to then have that responsibility of trying to help them.

      Do you think they would feel comfortable coming on this site? We have a live chat service every mon-fri from 5-7pm and can talk to them about what happened.

      You can also contact rape crisis for advice - http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/ 0808 802 9999

      I hope this helps,
      Jo

      This is Abuse team - 25/02/2014

  • kyleigh

    17/02/2014

    Was in a 2 year relationship all was great first couple months. Always used his money to get around me. Until one night he constantly touched me while in bed gotnwoken up several tine with him actually having sexual intercourse with myself. Tried pushing him away an telling him no. Nothing seemed to work. It was happenening an awduly lot got pregnant where he still constantly done the same thing. Most of the time he done it while I was sleeping. Yntil kne night I was pretending to be asleep an forze there again he still had sex without my permission even 2 days after the baby told him no. He still forced himself on me.
    No one in my family believed me even when it was reported ..
    I have to live with this an look at my daughter every day knowing what he has done to myself. .

    Reply

    kyleigh - 17/02/2014

    • Hi Kyleigh

      What you are describing is rape, if someone forces sex when you are asleep then they do not have your consent. It must have been very frightening, especially when you were pregnant and so soon after giving birth.

      Are you still in the relationship? I understand how hard it must be and that your daughter may seem like a constant reminder of what happened, but she is a separate person to him, and your safety and hers is the most important thing.

      I think you need some support to cope with what has happened, you went through an extreme trauma - rape crisis are brilliant and will be able to listen to you and support you. They also have local centres all around the country - http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/
      freephone helpline - 0808 802 9999

      You can also ring the national domestic violence helpline on 0800 2000 247 if you are still with him, or even if you are not as he may still try to contact you. There may also be issues around him wanting contact with your baby, in which case the helpline can advise you on that and how to make sure it happens safely.

      You do not have to cope with this alone, none of this was your fault and there is alot of support here for you.
      We also have a live chat every mon-fri from 5-7pm if you ant to talk to us more.
      take care
      Jo

      This is Abuse team - 18/02/2014

  • Lisa

    13/02/2014

    I was heavily pregnant when it forst happend to me it was my boyfriend at the time (not my babys dad) and he got drunk he wouldnt take no for an answer and seemed to like the struggle it all stopped for a few weeks untill i had my baby then it started again even of my baby was in the same room if i cried he seemed to like it more this carried on for months until i finally got the courage to end it. I have been on anti depressants ever since and this happend just over three years ago i was too scared to go to the police i thought they would nust say well its your boyfriend so it was consentual i blame myself for it all happening if only i had walked away after the 1st time

    Reply

    Lisa - 13/02/2014

    • Hello Lisa

      Thanks for contacting us and finding the courage to talk about what has happened to you. It is never easy to leave an abusive relationship whatever the circumstances and it is really common for the person who has been abused to feel they are responsible and to blame. It is important for you to know that this is not your fault and you are in no way responsible for what happened.

      Have you got anyone you can talk to for some emotional support? I can hear that this is still a struggle for you but having someone you trust to confide in can help. You might also want to consider whether you would want to report this to the police. The fact it was some time ago doesn't make any difference.The police take all disclosures of rape very seriously irregardless of how long ago it happened. The other thing worth mentioning is that most people who experience rape actually know the perpetrator so again the police would not be dismissive because he was your boyfriend - they support many women in situations similar to what you are describing as part of their daily work.

      Whether you decide to report or not really the most important thing is for you to have some help so you can come to terms with what has happened and move forward and enjoy your life. You could think about calling the charity Rape Crisis on 0808 802 9999 who are very experienced in supporting people with your circumstances. Again it doesn't matter that this happened a while ago and they can provide you with advice and counselling. If that doesn't sound like the right choice for you maybe try and talk to your GP to see if they can arrange some counselling for you. It can feel scary to think about talking about it but long term it may help you move forward.

      We also have Live Chat sessions Mon- Fri 5 -7 if it would help to chat to one of us. I hope that helps as a starting point and that things start to improve for you

      Take care
      Linda

      This is Abuse team 15/02/2014

  • Georgia

    04/02/2014

    i was in a relationship on and off for 3 years with this boy. For the first few months of the relationship everything was perfect, he complimented me and made me feel special.. when i was 14 i had sex with him, and i used to go to his house every weekend, things got progressively worse.. Every time i went round, if i couldnt stay for long he would get angry and not talk to me and everytime he wanted sex off me, he started flirting with lots of girls and boasted about it to my face and made me cry and get angry. The memories were great but after a year, he started calling me ugly and fat and started hitting me for no reason, every night he would want a picture (dirty) and if it wasnt good enough or i didnt want to, he wouldnt talk to me or he would talk to me in a way which made me feel low. He made me and my family fall out, the police got involved, i got kicked out the house and nearly sent to boarding schoool because of how i acted and how bad i was. I have now bee n diagnosed with MDD and i dont have the confidence about myself that i used to and cant help but miss everything good that happened with him.. could you give me advice on what to do to boost my confidence and get over my ex?

    Reply

    Georgia - 04/02/2014

    • Hello Georgia

      Thank you for getting in touch with us. It sounds like you have had a terrible time and its no surprise that you feel low in confidence and are struggling to recover from this. Now that you have managed to get out of this relationship Georgia have you been able to talk to someone about what it was like and what went on. One of the most important things for you is to be able to get some support and be able to talk about what happened. Are the services supporting you with the MDD able to help?Maybe they could arrange some counselling for you.

      There are services out there that could help for example a survivors programme where you attend a group with women who have had similar experiences.Also some areas also offer self esteem groups or assertiveness courses especially for women. If you call the national helpline on 0808 2000 247 they will be able to tell you more about whats available in your area so try and give them a call.

      it can feel really daunting to think about attending a group but most people who decide to attend fiund them really useful. It helps you make new friendships and to understand that the abuse is not your fault - that in itself will help boost your confidence.

      I hope you are able to get some local help and that things improve soon

      Take care
      Linda

      This is Abuse team 05/02/2014

  • k

    03/02/2014

    I was raped by a neighbour i thought was helping - my washing machine flooded and water was leaking everywhere he fixed the machine and then raped me - I was 17 at the time it happened in my bed next just feet away from my sleeping son. I went to the police and to court - All he got was a two year suspended sentence - I have counselling , take anti depressants and keep a diary. but I'm still left with the flashbacks,nightmares daily thoughts of hatred and that I am dirty. I feel as though he has won and I will never be me again. I dont understand how the 'justice' system can let one down so much. I really find it hard to see a way out of this. It feels like the rest of my life was carved out for me that night. I just want to know if anyone else is further on in thier journey and has found a way out yet because I'm fast loosing hope.

    Reply

    k - 03/02/2014

    • Dear K,

      Thank you for your message. I can hear how angry and distressed you are. You did not get the justice you deserved and I understand how difficult you are finding your recovery. Rape is a terrifying ordeal and the after affects can be frightening and overwhelming at times.

      You suffered a life-changing event and the process of healing is a slow one. I hear that you feel that your life has been damaged beyond repair by the rape and I want to reassure you that there is more support out there for you if the help you have had has been inadequate for your needs. Have you spoken to any other survivors of rape? It sounds like this is something you are looking for by posting here. I have put a link below to a website where you can look for groups in your area where you may be able to meet other women who have gone through what you have, and where you can talk about the journey you are on with them.

      http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/centres.php

      You have taken lots of steps to assist yourself in your recovery and have had to be proactive in doing that. It’s a hard thing to do and it shows how strong and capable you are that you have done all this and to have gone through a court case, which is always traumatic.

      It sounds like you may need some more support to help you deal with the feelings of nightmares and the flashbacks you are experiencing. I would encourage you to call Rape Crisis, they are an organisation who specialise in working with women and girls who have suffered sexual violence and trauma. They can talk with you in a confidential and non-judgemental setting. You can reach them on 0808 802 (12 –2.30 & 7 – 9.30 everyday). The helpline can be a good place to talk about things when they become overwhelming. I have also put some links below that may be helpful for you.

      http://www.rasasc.org.uk/wp/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/rapeCrisisSouthLondon_copingWithFlashbacks_forSurvivors.pdf

      http://www.rasasc.org.uk/wp/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/rapeCrisisSouthLondon_postTraumaticStressDisorder.pdf


      You say you feel that your attacker has won, but you reported to the police, went to court and got a guilty verdict. While the sentence was not one that could satisfy anyone, you did a good and difficult thing, and you did win. And by living your life and continuing to heal you are winning now.

      Take care and thanks again for your message.

      Becca

      This is Abuse team 04/02/2014

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