If you could see yourself
If you could see yourself, would you see rape?
Sex with someone who doesn't want to is rape.
If you could see yourself, would you see rape?
Sex with someone who doesn't want to is rape.
Please read and accept these rules below before commenting. All of the comments you post on this website are treated confidentially and moderated.
Stay safe – don't include any personal information in your comments, such as your surname, email address, street address and phone number.
Don't include the personal details of anyone else in your posts (including boyfriend/girlfriend, parents, guardians, teachers, social workers or group leaders).
Don't go off topic - keep your comments relevant to the "This Is Abuse" debate. People want their opinions to be heard – don't shout them down.
Don't post crude, racist, offensive, violent or vulgar messages to the site.
Treat everyone with respect – even if someone has a different view to your own, don't let it get personal.
Don't glamorise illegal or dangerous activities, including violence of any kind. It's ok to talk about your experiences but you shouldn't encourage others to do anything illegal or dangerous.
Don't write anything that's untrue about anyone else (including boyfriend/girlfriend, parents, guardians, teachers, social workers, group leaders and famous people). Don't write anything that could harm anyone else's reputation.
This isn't a dating site – it's a platform to talk about teenage relationship abuse and your opinions on the matter; don't use it to meet or flirt with other people.
Don't write everything in CAPS – it's the equivalent of shouting and isn't polite or easy for everyone to read.
Don't post entire messages in text speak – it's ok to shorten some words but not everyone understands text speak or finds it easy to read.
It's ok to post links to other websites as long as they're relevant to the "This Is Abuse" debate and don't break the house rules in any way.
Don't break copyright rules. This means that you shouldn't post text you didn't write.
natalia
08/04/2012
well i think men are to vilont and tak a relationship to fast and they dont know that they are hurting the girl they should get punished cause it is not fair
Replynatalia - 08/04/2012
Charley
08/04/2012
hi, i am Charley, i am female just so you know i aint being sexist, i recone this website is a brilliant idea but, why does it always show boys being the bad ones why do it not show any girls being the bad ones as i know people who this has hapend to but it was the girls doing it to the boys and i dont apprecate the way people try and blame the boys for it s i would like to see atleast one video wee the poor boys are the victims
Replyyousincerley Chaley x
Charley - 08/04/2012
i agree there was a lady who raped a guy by using viagra pills.
girl - 15/04/2012
to be honest that is true i am a girl my slef and theere is a girl @ my school tht is abusive
unavalible - 11/04/2012
Helena
07/04/2012
if the man just undress's you or touches you without consent can he still be arrested
ReplyHelena - 07/04/2012
hi, elena
Yes, if this was against someones will, then this is sexual harassment/abuse and is unacceptable.
laura - 11/04/2012
Claire
07/04/2012
my mum was raped when she was little and it makes me sick when i even think why someone would do such a thing. i feel really nervous when a boy shows interest in me. i just dont want to end up with what happened to my mum.
ReplyClaire - 07/04/2012
charlie
07/04/2012
I had several bad experiences when growing up, my uncle was the first to start, he was only groping. Shortly after it was my half brother, I actually thought it was the normal and he told me not to tell anyone. I remember one time was in a tent in my room we put up for my friend staying over ( i was around aged 7) in the morning i woke up to find my brother in the tent (my friend out of the tent and in my bed) i told him not to but he continued (my brother aged 11). A few years passed i was around the age 11 and now my brother 15, i was over at my nans in the spare bedroom where we would play, my cousin came over ages around 16 at the time, i didnt hear what my brother said but all i knew was my cousin was on the move to the bed where i was, he started to grope me and started to kiss me. My brother just sat the on the playstation and allowed this to happen, next my brother left the room and my cousin grabbed my hand and put it down his pants. Shortly after i was abused. my nana then took us to the swimming baths where my cousin came in my changing room and tried it on again, i told him to get out, i left and my nana was just coming around the corner. Now everytime i see them all i feel uncomfortable, i had a boyfriend around year 9 (aged around 13) after a year of on and off relationship, he invited me to stay the night, i knew he wasnt the type to want to just have sex and leave, i just couldnt face it. But now i have a boyfriend who i have been with for 10months, we had sex really early in our relationship, only because he made me feel so safe with him, of course i was nervous but all im trying to say is hopefully one day everyone who has been abused will be able to trust someone one day (aged 17 now by the way) Keep strong
Replycharlie - 07/04/2012
Ella
07/04/2012
I haven't been abused in anyway, but i watched the advert and thought to myself how could it be prevented? is it possible that this situation would never come true, could someone stop it from happening before it is too late?
ReplyElla - 07/04/2012
bdgd
07/04/2012
i tink that it is really important that this metter is hightlighted because a lot of the time men or woman are to scared to tell anyone there promblem and have no to go .there is a really good progam callled "i never said yes " which expalins the thing that people go thought and what was done
Replybdgd - 07/04/2012
Tyler
06/04/2012
Hello,
Replyim 11 and i get scared of rape everytime a boy or man looks at me i think 'hes going to rape,me or do something to me i get scared even if a boy or men just gives me 1 look.
This clip is awful but helps the rapest to think before he does.
Thanks x
Tyler - 06/04/2012
sharlene
06/04/2012
this is totaly true !
Replymy nieber got raped a fter that she didnt even want to her the word 'rape'
sharlene - 06/04/2012
The Industry Hater
06/04/2012
I think this message will make guys want to rape women even more. Why? Its a psychological thing. For the men that have watched this, this clip is stored in their brain. Now, the brain is programmed to these kind of things, even though we've been told it is abuse. Subconsciously we don't know we do these things, but because the brain has seen these kind of actions, it responds to the time and place on what we do.
ReplyFor example, as we all know "Smoking Kills". However, people still buy cigarettes because of what they see in the cigarette boxes. We see a man with a tumor coming out of his throat, or lungs blacked out by tar. These images are stored in the brain, and instead of PREVENTING SMOKING BY NOT THINKING about it, you are actually thinking about it through the images that you remember seeing in the cigarette boxes. This then leads people to actually want to buy cigarettes.
The only way we can prevent these things from happening in a party, is to prevent the party from happening overall, as this can lead to other abuses. Sexual, drugs and other stuff. Just don't think about it, but know what's right and prevent it from happening. I hope this helps
The Industry Hater - 06/04/2012
Invisible
05/04/2012
I am 14 years old. Two years ago I was at a friends house celebrating her birthday, and her older brother (I think he was 17 at the time) Came downstairs and made us all drinks. Now I think about it, I was pretty stupid to actually drink it, but I did and we all fell asleep. I don't know how much later it was, but I woke up and I was alone in one of the rooms upstairs naked. I just got dressed and went downstairs like nothing happened, and because everyone else was still asleep they didn't know and I just didn't want anyone to know. Of course, I should of said something.A few months later, I had some serious bleeding 'down there', I don't really want to think about it but it must have been a miscarrige. That's just scary. 12 and pregnant. Who knows how many more girls he has taken up there? Had I of said something, would I have saved how ever many more girls the trauma? How many of the girls were pregnant? How many of the girls were given STD? Thank God I didn't get any STDs, I guess that is the only good thing that came out of it.
ReplyI think it is a good idea to make people more aware of rape. Like many have said, It can happen to anyone at anytime, even if you think you are in a safe enviroment. And men, boys, women and girls, whoever is being abusive, need to know that it's not right. At all.
Invisible - 05/04/2012
I went to this school and they use to push me and my sister into the toilets and sexually assulted us there needs to be more on this
J - 10/04/2012
Someone
05/04/2012
I used to convince myself that what happened to me wasn't rape and that it was my fault, but after seeing this advertised made realise that what happened to me wasn't my fault and I feel so much better about myself that he was an animal and I was just the victim. Thankyuu for tthis video as I was only 15 and am now 16, has helped alot. :)
ReplySomeone - 05/04/2012
Hi
We're glad the videos have helped. If you feel you need to talk to anyone about what happened, you can find details of suitable organisations on the Need Help page.
mystery woman!
05/04/2012
i think all tese storys are tru. I think and know its not right to be abusive/ sexual abusive to some one most of us no what it is like to be raped! i think we shoul try and put a stop to this dont you! what happened to me was like the RAPE video t isnt nice please lets hekp this nothapen to others.
Replymystery woman! - 05/04/2012
Christine
05/04/2012
I think it would be extremely helpful if you began the clips with a "trigger warning" for those of us who have been victims of sexual assault.
ReplyChristine - 05/04/2012
what you mean ?
lucy - 06/04/2012
john
05/04/2012
hi im 18 i remember getting raped by someone i was out having a few drinks with my mates and this man dragged me to his house and raped me i try to get away but it was to hard because i was drunk but i can remember picking up a class bottle and hitting him on the head with it. i dont go out anymore because my mates always slag me about it so i sit in the house all day every day and play the playstation 3
Replyjohn - 05/04/2012
i feel so sorry for you
lucy - 06/04/2012