This website works best using cookies, which are currently enabled. To find out more about cookies and for information on how to turn them off, click here.
This is ABUSE

Help uscall outabuse

HAVE YOUR SAY

Tell us what you think about abuse in relationships

If you've got something you'd like to talk about regarding any kind of relationship abuse, come and Have Your Say on our message board where you can talk to a trained advisor.

Have a read through the discussion boards, the chances are you'll be able to talk with someone who's gone through similar experiences to your own.

Seen the ads? What do you think?

TELL US WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT ABUSE IN RELATIONSHIPS

If you've got something to say about abuse in relationships then you'll need to accept our terms before you can take part - please see our rules on the right side of the page. You can then enter your comments below or under any video you want to talk about.

  • This is so we can email you to let you know if there's been any replies to your message. Your email address will never be shown or passed on to anyone.
  • I wish to opt out of notification emails
An expert from Young People’s Services – AVA – is reading and responding to posts on the site, to ensure that responses are independent, sensitive and helpful.

Pages << < 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 > >>

Results: 525 - 540 of 2146

  • anon

    14/01/2014

    3 years ago i had a bad experience with someone 5 years older, i was 13 and he was 18, he took advantage and when i asked him to stop during sex he wouldnt let me and then harrassed me afterwards, now 3 years on its affecting my relationships. ive just started seeing someone and the first time we had sex i just couldnt do it, all i could think about was him and i started crying, it affected the boy im seeing, he felt so bad and thought he had done something wrong but i just couldnt tell him what happened.. how can i stop him from affecting my relationships? i have bad trust issues now and i dont want my future to suffer, someone help me please

    anon - 14/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Anon,
      Thank you for your message. You went through a really frightening and horrible ordeal when you were very young and it’s not surprising you have felt unable to trust people and felt the emotional after effects of this. You have been really brave to write here, you don’t have to cope on your own with this anymore.

      What happened to you was rape and then you had to cope with being harassed. That’s a really hard thing for a person to deal with and you have sown real strength to cope. Have you had any support, such as from family or friends? I understand that rape is a difficult thing to discuss with people you know.

      If you have not had anyone to talk to I would encourage you to call Rape Crisis. They are confidential helpline and who work with women and girls who have experienced sexual violence. They will be able to talk with you about your experience and how this is affecting you, and what help is available to you to assist in your recovery. You can reach them on 0808 802 9999 (12-2.30pm, 7-9:30pm).

      Take care,
      Becca


      This is Abuse team 17/01/2014

  • christine

    14/01/2014

    My bfriend keeps leaving me and don't speak for weeks or months at a time..leaving me feel abandoned...I've had him back lots of times and still he does the same over a little row or sometimes because I give opinions...I feel confused and not sure if this is emotional abuse..would like to know other people's opinion

    christine - 14/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Christine,

      Thanks for getting in touch. It sounds like you're having a really difficult time with your parter. I think it's really important to keep in mind what you think a healthy relationship is, and by coming forward to this website and talking about how your boyfriend is behaving you are aware that what is happening is not a healthy relationship.

      In a healthy relationship you respect your partner's opinions, and even if they are different to yours you talk about them. You may even argue about them, but then you resolve this. It should not result in him ignoring you for weeks or months. I think it would be helpful for you to talk to the National Helpline on 0808 2000 247 about what has been going on. It is a confidential helpline, so you don't have to give them any details you don't want to.

      Take Care,

      Becca

      This is Abuse team 17/01/2014

  • Rose

    14/01/2014

    My husband keep swearing at me and calling me names, critiquing the way I dress up, is that consider mental abuse? What should I do about it? I feel not valued, not respected, whenever we go out he keep looking at other girls and even try to talk to them in front of me

    Rose - 14/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Rose,

      Thank you for your message. The way your husband is treating you is abusive and there is support for you to access. You have made a big step posting here.

      Verbally abusing you, making you feel you cannot dress how you would like, putting you down are all forms of emotional abuse and can have a massive impact on a person. It sounds like you are feeling these affects, such as lowered self-worth and anxiety. You don’t have to cope on your own with this.

      Have you discussed what is happening with anyone, family, friends or anyone else in your life? If you don’t feel you can talk about it with anyone you know you can call the 24 hour domestic violence helpline - you can reach them on 0800 2000 247. You can discuss with them your feelings and get advice that can help you decide what to do next. You can also look on this website www.womensaid.org.uk for support in your area.

      We have a live chat from 5-7 on the site and you can speak to someone if you feel you like to discuss this more.

      Take care,
      Becca

      This is Abuse team 17/01/2014

  • Annabelle

    14/01/2014

    Okay ive been with my boyfriend for 2 years, we had a on and off patch for about a year before but we settled down and i moved into his house, for the first months it was perfect, i fell pregnant and we were both over the moon until i miscarried,we slowly rebuilt ourselves but he shut it out where as i needed to grieve, the past few weeks his friends are round all the time and he's snapping a lot more, one time he got really angry and shoved me in the shoulder and went on a rant calling me names, i knew he was an angry person when we got together but i always balanced him out and keep him calm and now he seems to take everything out on me, i know i should just pack my stuff and leave i think about what i would when i leave but there's always something holding me back, i cant put my finger on what it is and I'm struggling to talk to him now incase instead of understanding he just loses it again?

    Annabelle - 14/01/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Annabel,

      Thank you for your message. I can hear that you are feeling confused at the moment and trapped in your relationship. You have taken a really big step seeking support, you don’t have to deal with this on your own.

      You have had a really difficult time, miscarrying and also being in an abusive relationship. The way your partner is treating you is not ok, and you know that. You feel like you used to be able to cam him but now that has changed and you are frightened of him and trying to make sure he does not get angry. What is happening is not your fault and your partner is choosing to act in the way he does, you cannot change him, only he can choose to stop abusing you.

      Have you discussed what is happening with anyone, family, friends or anyone else in your life? If you don’t feel you can talk about it with anyone you know you can call the 24 hour domestic violence helpline - you can reach them on 0800 2000 247. You can discuss with them your feelings and get advice that can help you decide what to do next.

      We have a live chat from 5-7 on the site and you can speak to someone if you feel you like to discuss this a bit more.
      Take care,
      Becca

      This is Abuse team 17/01/2014

  • Hugo

    14/01/2014

    This campaign is absolutely fantastic, and needs to be well-publicised - however the one criticism I have about it is that all 3 of the video scenarios are heterosexual couples, which just enforces the popular belief that abuse doesn't happen in homosexual relationships.

    I was in an abusive relationship, but on a mental scale - he would put me down, stop me seeing my friends and also go through my phone to check my text messages. I got out of there, but I'm a lucky one...

    This is a really good campaign.

    Hugo - 14/01/2014

    Reply
    • Thanks for your comment Huge. You are right, abuse can happen just as much in homosexual relationships. I am really sorry to hear that you experienced abuse in your relationship and glad you are safe now.

      There is a really good national charity that provides confidential support to all members of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Trans (LGBT) communities who are experiencing domestic abuse.

      http://www.brokenrainbow.org.uk/

      take care
      Jo

      This is Abuse team 16/01/2014

  • Meg

    13/01/2014

    I was in a relationship for five years, had two children. Eventually things turned sour we would argue fight and it was constant every day I was constantly made to feel like I was doing something wrong being bullied and belittled by someone I thought loved me. He would heck my phone ask who I was with where I was I didn't have a life I was never aloud out I wasn't aloud to see my family. I was aloud to start working or go to college or do anything, I felt so low for so long I felt so numb. So I finally decided enough was enough decided to leave, he moved out and I finally thought I was free but he set out to make my life a living hell I had to have the locks changed he harrassed me was harassing my friends to find out where I was who I was with ringing my family asking them stuff It was horrible. One night after he had had the children for the day he barged into the house and raped me threatened to kill me and take the kids away from me. I eventually plucked up the corauge to tell the police. He's now on his way to jail for what he done to me. And I'm finally picking up the peices, abuse is never ok. Be brave enough to leave or at least talk to someone. I have had so much support and help, you deserve so much more than to be bullied and tormented. Nobody deserves that. I hope people read this and realise or relate.

    Meg - 13/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Meg,

      Thank you for sharing your story. It takes real courage to do. I'm pleased you have had the support you deserve to help you in your recovery.

      Thanks again for sharing your story.

      Take care,

      Becca

      This is Abuse team 16/01/2014

  • Lauren

    13/01/2014

    I was in a abuaive relationship and I wouldnt wish it on anyone and I was also pregnant but when I find out I was I got out I was scared to before I find out its not that easy but it was the best to get out im now finally happy and have my little girl but ino how people feel&go through but if I can do it so can you :)

    Lauren - 13/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Lauren,

      Thank you for sharing your story with people reading the site. I can see you went though a lot and I’m pleased to hear you and your child are now in a happier situation. You were really strong to make that happen.
      Have you had any support for the abuse you suffered? If not and you feel you would like some, this website is a good place to look.

      www.womensaid.org.uk

      Take care,

      Becca

      This is Abuse team 16/01/2014

  • kat

    13/01/2014

    PLEASE HELP! i think im in abusive relationship I've been with my partner for 3 years we have a 2 year old together and since my mum passed away a year ago he's been really controlling wont let me go see friends calls me names and says if i go out he's taking our son and ill never see him again i do t no what to do anymore please help x

    kat - 13/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Kat,

      Thank you for your message. I can hear that you are feeling quite trapped and in need of some support at the moment. You have done a really strong thing by posting here and there is help you can access.

      Since the death of your mother, when you will have been very vulnerable, you r partner has started to be emotionally abusive, controlling and verbally abusive to you. What is happening is not your fault and you don’t have to cope alone with it. I understand it may feel like there is nowhere to turn at the moment but there is.

      Have you spoken to anyone in your life about what is happening. Friends or family? If you don’t feel you can do this, you can speak to a professional services about the abuse. There are lots out there and they will be able to give you some support and some advice about what to do next.

      I would encourage you to call the 24 -hour domestic abuse helpline on 0808 2000 247. You can speak to them about how you are feeling and what options you could take. You might also want to look on this website for more information about domestic abuse www.womensaid.org.uk. The way your partner is treating you is not ok, you deserve some support to help you deal with it.

      You say he is also using contact with your son as a threat. I have put a links here you might want to look at, as they can advise you about what legal rights you have in this situation.

      http://www.childrenslegalcentre.com/index.php?page=legal_advice_lines

      http://www.rightsofwomen.org.uk/

      Take care,

      Becca

      This is Abuse team 16/01/2014

  • Em

    13/01/2014

    My friend is in a relationship with a guy who is makes her feel guilty about her past and sais things like when I was out last night there was at least 10 blokes out that she's slept with and the truth is she never has even slept with that many.

    Her boyfriend insisted that they both do something for them and that they both go have dinner on a Saturday night but instead he went out with his mates got drunk and didn't bother to tell her till after she had got dressed. the following week he promised to take her out the weekend after and make it up to her.. She wanted to make him a dinner on the Friday night and he driving home from work said he need to pop to his brothers. she started dinner got everything ready to find that he gets home 2.30 in the morn very drunk Also a few months back after she had an abortion and a few hours before they was due to go on holiday he said your only coming if u promise not to be a slut he controls her makes her loose confidence and he shod really be supportive and this is not half off it.. Any advise ???

    Em - 13/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Em,

      Thank you for your message. I can hear how difficult this must be for you seeing your friend in this situation. You are obviously able to support her, which is important, as she needs people around her that will be understanding and not judge her while in this relationship. Which sounds exactly what you are doing.

      It seems that you have been able to talk to her about his behaviour. In a gentle and non-judgemental way you could discuss respect in relationships with her and ask her how she feels about the situation she is in. If she does not want to talk about it let her know that you are always there for her.

      When we care about someone we can want him or her to end an abusive relationship quickly, as we don’t like to see him or her hurt. However ending it is something only your daughter can do in her own time.

      Let her know that you care for her and will always be available for her to talk to and there are places like this website and the domestic abuse helpline she can contact (0808 2000 247) It is important that she has people to turn to that she can trust, and you are one of those people.

      You may also want to look on this website for more information for friends and family of people in abusive relationships.

      http://www.womensaid.org.uk/domestic-violence-articles.asp?itemid=1296&itemTitle=Support+for+family+and+friends+of+women+experiencing+abuse§ion=00010001002200410001§ionTitle=Articles%3A+domestic+violence

      Take care,

      Becca


      This is Abuse team 16/01/2014

  • Sarah

    13/01/2014

    My partner and i have been together for 2 and a half years. From the start of the relationship he asked me how many people I had slept with before him, i made up an number as i believe that is something that is no one else's business but my own. As the time has gone one we have always argued about it he has called me nasty names and threatened to tell people i was a slut! Eventually after all this time i have told him the amount of ppl i have slept with because he has made me feel so bad about it. He has said that i have lied to him for all this time and how is he meant to believe me again. I believe that past is past and it should be kept there. I was scared to tell him as i knew he would call me nasty names and say alsorts of horrible things. Am i in the wrong for not being honest with him from the start?

    Sarah - 13/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Sarah,

      Thank you for your message. I can hear that you are feeling confused about what is happening in your relationship.

      If your partner is being verbally abusive and threatening to tell people personal things about you this is emotional abuse. He is justifying his actions by blaming you for them, but he is choosing to treat you the way he is. The number of people you have slept with is no reason to be abusive to you and you also have a right not to share that information with anyone. You had your reasons for not being honest with him, and this dishonesty does not justify treating you badly.

      Have you spoken to anyone in your life about the way your partner is acting? If not maybe you can give the domestic abuse helpline a call on 0808 2000 247.

      We have live chat weeknights from 5-7, you can use it to talk about how you are feeling and what you could do next.

      Take care,

      Becca

      This is Abuse team 16/01/2014

  • Hawk

    13/01/2014

    Hey MTV
    I am so happy to see you guys behind this - I am now 22 and this is my story - I hope it can help in some way.
    in July 2011 I started a relationship with my now ex who landed up being the worst thing that ever happened to me but in return I have learnt so much! At first he would cheat on me when I found out he would manipulate me to feel bad, he then started to tell me I couldn't go out with my friends be or would manipulate me to feel bad convinced my friends were against our relationship so i felt my only option was to take him with me when I went out with my friends where he would bring me down and make me the laughing stock of the group or just cut my friends off completely that way I wouldn't be embarrassed infront of everyone and I wouldn't be brought down and made to feel inferior constantly. After this he targeted my family members, again convinced my dad hated him and sent messages to my dad that were really horrible and I landed up not talking to my dad for a year, his brother and him would laugh at me for doing for feeling insecure in front of my face - it seems petty but it makes you feel really stupid and again so embarrassed. He would manipulate me to feel bad about watching my weight and would purposely take me out to places which weren't the places I need to be so landed up putting on 25kgs..

    After all this when I eventually hit rock bottom and noticed I had isolated so many good people in my life for someone who kicks me while I'm down he then started to tell me he was going to kill himself if I broke up with him - after one year and 8 months in this relationship my youngest brother was diagnosed with a serious illness - I was obviously with my family at this time and begged him to give my family and myself time to process the news he told me he had booked tickets and was coming - I then told him in that case I think we needed space and on a night where I was told my brother probably wouldn't pull through he told me he was again going to kill himself, he then proceeded to bully me and at the same time charm everyone else around me and the people I slowly started to reconnect with in my life. There is really so much I can say but right now i finally ended things with him - and to make my life as hard as he can he now attends the same uni as me and is in the same year which he only applied to do to make sure I wouldn't "flirt with other guys" - he continues to charm everyone around me, I have made friends again with new people who support me and I know I would not be where I am today without these people as I often thought that there was no way out but to kill myself at a stage.
    He also decided he had to go through my messages and Facebook and sent messages an deleted boys from my Facebook because "they were flirting with me"
    For everyone out there who have been through relationships like this - i speak for myself the abuse hasn't ended rebuilding yourself after an abusive relationship is one of the hardest things I have ever done - just remember one thing it's never okay for someone to make you feel inferior or manipulate your feelings it's so hard but ending a relationship like this is the best thing you can do for yourself! Thank you mtv for finally recognising that this happens! I hope my story was worth telling - 4 months ago I broke up with my ex and although I am no where near confident yet this has really helped me being able to tell part of what happened to me.

    Hawk - 13/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Hawk,

      Thank you so much for sharing your story with people reading the site. It takes a lot of courage to talk about what you have been through and I’m pleased you have been able to. I can hear how much you want to help other people in the situation you were in.

      Yu have done the really hard thing, which was ending the relationship and I’m happy to hear you have a good support network around you. I’m just wondering if you have had any specialist help for women who have been in abusive relationships? If not you can look on this website to see if there is anything in your area. www.womensaid.org.uk . You went through an ordeal with your ex and you deserve some support to help you process that and help you rebuild your confidence.
      Thanks again for sharing your story,

      Take care,
      Becca

      This is Abuse team 16/01/2014

  • Natale

    13/01/2014

    I cannot get out of a relationship, even though I know that he doesn't care about me I don't know if its abuse but I cannot win an argue/discussion and I'm always may to feel at fault. He's doesn't hit me but he does hurt me.
    is this abuse???

    Natale - 13/01/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Natalie,

      Thank you for your message, I can hear that you are feeling very confused at the moment and hurt and would like some clarification and support. It also sounds like you feel trapped in a relationship that is causing you pain, that’s a really hard thing to feel.

      Your message is quite brief so it’s hard to gage what is happening without much information. Would you like to join us for a live chat from 5-7 on a weeknight, or maybe post again with more details, so we can give you some support and more accurate guidance.

      Take care,
      Becca

      This is Abuse team 16/01/2014

  • Lily

    13/01/2014

    If I'm not in a physically abusive relationship, how can I work out if I'm in an emotional one? I'm fighting a lifelong depression which sometimes gets a bit psychotic, but I can't stop my mind from wandering it's not me making me wonder. I'm completely in love and maybe that helps mask it, but the whole thing is very indirect. I've never met anyone like him in both positive and negative ways; everything in common but let's just say there's a bitchy mindset.

    I don't know what to do. I don't want to leave something if he's who I thought he was.

    I spoke to a very close friend and gave many examples of his indirect phrases and controlling arguments and he said I should leave, that when I look back I'll see how misguided I was by him. And this isn't a jealousy thing on my friends.

    Why am I used to justifying everything I do? I don't think I every used to but I don't know who I am anymore. I don't have friends anymore. All I have is him and I think he may take advantage of that.

    Lily - 13/01/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Lilly
      I was in the same sort of relationship I knew something was missing and I hated having to explain every little thing I said its just so wearing, I found that however carefully I said things he would take offense and be argumentative with me.

      At the time I thought it was tiny things it doesn't matter but they grew and grew,
      in the end I realized I can't spend the rest of my life being put down and shouted at over nothing, I was becoming unhappy in myself.

      He always seemed loving but that was just words and once I stopped listening to the words and watching his actions towards me I realized he treated me worse than I would have treated my worst enemy.
      I kept thinking, he'll see how much I've done for him one day, he'll learn to appreciate me and he never did.

      I am ill too and my ex made me think that I was the problem for everything, and because I was ill I stayed far longer than I should have. I should have trusted my instincts and so should you, also if your friend can see that its controlling then it isn't just you thinking its wrong, it's real and its abuse.

      I wish I had got out much sooner than I did and although it was so hard to leave him because I still loved him the fact is that however much he said he loved me he never treated me with any amount of respect and eventually I realized I deserved better than that.

      hope this helps.

      S - 17/01/2014

    • Hi Lilly,

      Thank you for your message, I can hear how confused you are at the moment with what is happening in your relationship and I’m pleased you have felt able to post here. What is happening is not your fault and you deserve some support.
      You mention a few things in your message that sound like you are in an abusive relationship. Your partner is putting you down in ways you find hard to pinpoint and you wonder if he is the person you thought he was. It sounds like he has isolated you from your friends and you have to justify your actions to him. That doesn’t sound healthy and does sound abusive.

      Your friend sounds like they were trying to show you something in your relationship is not right. Were you able to discuss your own fears with them? Have you spoken to other people, such as family about your feelings? If not I would encourage you to call the domestic violence helpline on 0808 2000 247. Talking about what is happening may give you a bit more clarity and help you decide what you would like to do next.
      We have a live chat from 5-7 on the site and you can speak to someone if you feel you like to discuss this a bit more.

      Take care,

      Becca

      This is Abuse team 16/01/2014

  • Andy

    13/01/2014

    When I was 18, I got into a relationship with a woman 8 years older. She would check my phone, my emails, demand yo know where I was all the time, who i has seen and talked to. accused me of cheating constantly, scream at me moving around if she heard me move from another room. She stayed at my mums with me some times but she broke all the doors as when screaming at me I would often lock myself in a room to escape her. There was some physical abuse, pulling hair and scratching but 90% was physiological. I was young and naive, anyone i tried to talk to about it would either ignore me or just make fun.. the world was telling me its basically normal. So i stayed way longer than I should have... please please please could you run an ad that shows that this is abuse!

    Andy - 13/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Andy,

      Thank you for your message. I can hear what a traumatic experience you had in your past relationship and I’m glad that you are in a better situation now. You are right, abuse does happen with males as the victims as well as females. All comments are being taken into consideration for future campaigns and I have forwarded your message on.

      Abusive relationships can have an effect on a person after the event and you may feel you need some support. If this is the case you can contact the Men’s Advice Line on 0808 801 03 27. They are a great organisation who work with male victims and are open 9-5 weekday.

      Thanks again for your message and take care,
      Becca

      This is Abuse team 17/01/2014

  • Hannah

    13/01/2014

    I was in an abusive relationship about a year ago when I was 15/16. I didn't know at the time and let a lot of things happen. It was verbal, sexual, and at at the end violent as well. I've tried counselling at my college, but when I tried to talk about it my Councillor seemed to ignore the seriousness and gloss over it. I'm still effected by what happened, but I'm not sure what to do or where to go? I don't like talking on the phone to people either. I usually just feel when I talk to someone about it they don't think it's as serious as it was or they think it's my fault

    Hannah - 13/01/2014

    Reply
    • Dear Hannah,
      Thank you for your message. It sounds like you have had some bad experiences seeking support for what you have been through, so it’s especially strong of you to post here.
      The things you describe in your message are really serious and I’m really sad to hear that you did not receive the support and care that you deserved. What happened to you was not your fault, a lot of people when faces with abuse of any kind try to blame the person it happened to. This isn’t how it should be and why I would encourage you to speak to a specialist in dealing with these things.
      You have had counseling at college which is a big step to take, even though it didn’t work out this has more to do with the counselor then counseling in general. If you look on this website you will be able to find somewhere in your area where you could find another person you could speak to.
      www.womensaid.org.uk
      If you want some support from this service we have a live chat from 5-7 weeknights where you can talk about what happened over instant message if you don’t feel able to talk on the telephone.
      If you do think you may want to try speaking to an organization you can call the 24 hour domestic violence helpline on 0808 2000 247. You can also call rape crisis to discuss the sexual abuse you suffered, they are a lovely organisation open every day 12.00- 2.30 & 7 -9.30.
      Take care.
      Becca

      This is Abuse team 16/01/2014

Pages << < 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 > >>

Results: 525 - 540 of 2146

Terms and conditions of use

Please read and accept these rules below before commenting. All of the comments you post on this website are treated confidentially and moderated.

Stay safe – don't include any personal information in your comments, such as your surname, email address, street address and phone number.

Don't include the personal details of anyone else in your posts (including boyfriend/girlfriend, parents, guardians, teachers, social workers or group leaders).

Don't go off topic - keep your comments relevant to the "This Is Abuse" debate. People want their opinions to be heard – don't shout them down.

Don't post crude, racist, offensive, violent or vulgar messages to the site.

Treat everyone with respect – even if someone has a different view to your own, don't let it get personal.

Don't glamorise illegal or dangerous activities, including violence of any kind. It's ok to talk about your experiences but you shouldn't encourage others to do anything illegal or dangerous.

Don't write anything that's untrue about anyone else (including boyfriend/girlfriend, parents, guardians, teachers, social workers, group leaders and famous people). Don't write anything that could harm anyone else's reputation.

This isn't a dating site – it's a platform to talk about teenage relationship abuse and your opinions on the matter; don't use it to meet or flirt with other people.

Don't write everything in CAPS – it's the equivalent of shouting and isn't polite or easy for everyone to read.

Don't post entire messages in text speak – it's ok to shorten some words but not everyone understands text speak or finds it easy to read.

It's ok to post links to other websites as long as they're relevant to the "This Is Abuse" debate and don't break the house rules in any way.

Don't break copyright rules. This means that you shouldn't post text you didn't write.