HAVE YOUR SAY
Tell us what you think about abuse in relationships
If you've got something you'd like to talk about regarding any kind of relationship abuse, come and Have Your Say on our message board.
The chances are you'll be able to talk with someone who's gone through similar experiences to your own.
Seen the ads? What do you think?
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Is controlling who a partner sees or speaks to abuse?
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Sex with someone who doesn't want to is rape.
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Sex with someone who doesn't want to is rape.
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Is putting pressure on someone to have sex abuse?
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Is bullying, controlling and putting a partner down abuse?
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Is insulting and threatening a partner with violence abuse?
TELL US WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT ABUSE IN RELATIONSHIPS
If you've got something to say about abuse in relationships then you'll need to accept our terms before you can take part - please see our rules on the right side of the page. You can then enter your comments below or under any video you want to talk about.
vinayak
19/01/2013
Rape is obscenity.It totally depends on an individual or individuals upbringing and ethics.
However some people watch rape sequence just for fantasy or educate themself of what pain a women goes through before and after.
vinayak - 19/01/2013
ReplyLuce
19/01/2013
My boyfriend has become very possessive over me and hates me talking to any other boys, he's deleted boys off my phone and has told me to stop talking to some of his friends. When I ask him why he is doing it he just says "every guy is like that" and I feel very bad about doing it- he always turns it round on me and asks how I would feel.
If I go out and he's not with me, he wants to know who I'm with and what I'm doing, he even told me to go home. He controls what I wear.
Tonight he snapped, we were arguing over something pathetic and he got so angry he pinned me down on the bed and started shouting at me, he later grabbed me and threw me on the bed and I hit my head. After this we argued again and he shook me violently, I have never ever felt scared around him, but tonight I was.
Luce - 19/01/2013
ReplyHi Luce,
Thanks for your post.
From what you have described these look like signs of abuse - visit http://thisisabuse.direct.gov.uk/am-i-abusive/view/spot-the-signs - for more information.
If you are suffering from emotional abuse, which can include someone putting you down, or calling you nasty names, trying to control you and stopping you doing certain things or making you do things you don’t want to do, it is important to find someone you trust to talk to.
Staying in a relationship where you are being emotionally and/or physically abused could cause you to lose your self-esteem and confidence. An abusive, violent or controlling relationship is not normal or acceptable; nobody needs to tolerate this behaviour and if the bullying is making you worried you need to speak to a trusted adult. This doesn’t have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and you feel you can trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.
You can talk to Childline in confidence on 0800 11 11 or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).
zoe
19/01/2013
Ive been talking to this boy on facebook and hes now my boyfriend.
He says if dont let his friend touch me he wont talk to me ever again hes tryed forcing me for sex i dont know what to do
zoe - 19/01/2013
ReplyHi Zoe,
Being forced or pressured to have sex or take part in sexual activity that you don’t feel comfortable with is totally unacceptable.
If you are being put under pressure to have sex when you don’t want to try and find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and trust.
If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.
You can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call National Freephone Rape Crisis Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999, 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm. Or you can visit www.rapecrisis.org.uk for further advice and information.
If you have been sexually assaulted you can also speak to the police. Most police forces have specially trained police officers who can help. You can contact the police immediately by dialling 999.
that is wrong.
you DO NOT. have to do anything you do not want to. this boy clearly has no respect for you if he is treating you this way.
being pressured or forced into sex/ sexual contact etc is wrong.
stay strong and say no and walk away. you will find a man who respects you. <3
kitty - 22/01/2013
Anon
18/01/2013
It happened when I was 14.
I was in a committed relationship and my boyfriend was really pushing it as he had just turned 16.
We were at my friends house party and everyone was very drunk, we went laughing upstairs and he pinned me on the bed and we were kissing.
Then he took his trousers off, I kept say no no no, but he just pinned me down and wouldn't stop I am now 24 and have never forgotten that. I talked to a counsellor and have had therapy since then but struggle to trust anyone.
Anon - 18/01/2013
ReplyHi Anon
Thanks for posting on the site. The campaign is aimed at 13-18 year olds but there are many specialist support services available for adults.
If you’re looking for support or advice you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge) or log-on to Women's Aid's Survivors' Message board: http://www.womensaid.org.uk/page.asp?section=0001000100080021§ionTitle=Survivors+Forum.
shannon w2
18/01/2013
Hi,
I have just hade a bad time in my life by finally admiting to my mum that my dad has been touching me since i was 5 and i am now 15years old,
I regret not telling anyone as i hade no life and now im getting alot more older and my school life is finishing, he would never let me go out, wear makeup or sleep out i felt isolated and he didnt let me sleep out at familys houses either as he new i would tell them in some way about it,
My mum feels quilt as she never relised this happened but she has an illness and was allways at work it was ever since i mooved into my new house shes started to notice it, as ever since i lived her i hade to sleep with him every night and he would make out it was because of her snoring he was such a mind player and miniputive and would shout and smack me so hard and chuck things at me i wasnt aloud a boyfriend and would allways be so nasty about him the bad thing was that i loveed and cared about him we hade a good relationship if u cut all the bad out.
I would say to anyone please tryy and tell someone even at school no one will find out life friends so u wont be embarrased and u can have ur life back now i am starting to now and i only addmitted this like 5 days ago and hes gone to prison adn i feel the changes allready its great, just please tell someone even runn away and tell family its worth it x
shannon w2 - 18/01/2013
ReplyHi Shannon,
Thanks for your post.
We are so sorry to hear about the abuse you suffered from your father. Understand that this was not your fault. There was nothing you could have done to prevent this.
If you are having difficulty or if you are feeling depressed it's important to talk about your experiences further - call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Bear
18/01/2013
..well the short version is..I love my ex girlfriend all the world and we was one min together the next we wasnt, and I could see she loved me in her beautiful eyes we were both virgins and I loved her and she said she wanted me to be her first and we did but soon after she left me all alone and I just keep thinking how lonely i am and I dont know what to do..I wouldnt see her hurt but she said for me to go away and never speak to her again, she was the one I wanted to marry and I think I'm always going to feel that way she had all I was looking for in the oppersit sex, I now find I'm depressed and I had to see a councillor..i really do wonder if she just wanted to lose her virginity..and all I do is think about her and I'm not sure if I regret it or what I'm just not sure...I know people are worse than me...but i just wondered if there was any IUSEFULL advice..
Bear - 18/01/2013
ReplyHi Bear,
You sound very low; the best advice we can give you is to find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. There are people who understand, and who can help you deal with the problems you are going through.
Alternatively you can call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
The Samaritans may also be able to help, take a look at their website at http://www.samaritans.org.uk/ or email jo@samaritans.co.uk. You can also call the Samaritans helpline on 08457 909090.
cr95
17/01/2013
Hey. This may be a waste of peoples time or even a waste of a message but I'm very curious about how my Boyfriends homebounds. There has been a few times his mum will, chuck objects at him, hit him very badly, shout abuse about him or people he knows, she torments him to the point he ends up hurting himself most times. This happens a lot, starts from a little arguement she will cause over anything like if he asks to go out. His mum doesn't like me much, I don't know why so she says things about myself in arguements that will anger him much more. I don't like going to his house because of all the stress that goes on, I wouldn't like to be caught up in one of these situations because I wouldn't know how to act, or what would happen to me. I give him advice, I suggest to him he moves out, we are both young teenagers. But he doesn't want to. As much as he doesn't like going home he still goes because he is scared of what might happen if he does move out. Everyday when he goes home he won't be happy, he will just be thinking ' oh I wonder what will kick of today ' no one should have to feel fear about their own parents. His mum is a very starnge woman and I amnt one to judge, but it upsets me what goes on, because its horrible and I get scared myself because, what if one day she does do somthing to seriously hurt him? I just want him to take advice and get this sorted
cr95 - 17/01/2013
ReplyHi cr95
Thanks for your post. Childline can offer help and advice about forms of physical abuse, being hurt, punched, kicked or hit. No problem is too big or too small for them and they can offer you appropriate information and support if necessary.
It's free to call on 0800 1111.
Remember if you or someone you know is being abused in any way, then the most important thing to do is talk to someone about it.
We hope that helps.
Anonymous
17/01/2013
I was in a relationship for a year and a half, my experience is a long story, but you dont need to know all the small details...the beginning of the relationship was amazing of course, he treated me like a princess...he was 33 and I was 17, nobody approved of course, my mum kicked me out so I went to live with him pretty soon into the relationship...he got a job and moved house with me..i owed him so much, he gave me a place to stay,food,everything I needed...but as soon as I finished school I was left at home all day doing nothing, so it began small, he would tell me to do all the house work,make him dinner and do his shopping...if I forgot to do something he would call me names, get mad at me and ignore me for a day or so...but then things got worse, he kept wanting sex every day, sometimes twice a day, if i refused he would call me selfish, a bitch, make me feel guilty so eventually i would do what he wanted...I got thrush and it hurt so bad to have sex but he didnt care, he still wanted it...eventually i just stopped trying, i would just lie there when he did the things he wanted to do, then i would cry myself to sleep..he didnt care...if i ever tried to leave him he would find me, convinve me he changed...but it just got worse, he slapped me sometimes, pushed me, called me more names and stopped me from having friends, he broke my phone and deleted my facebook page...then one time i tried to leave, i was just about to open the door when he grabbed me a pushed me onto the tiled floor, then he took me by the wrist and dragged me into the other room...I had had enough, so i went online and looked for an au-pair job, when i got one i moved in with that family and didnt tell him where i was going...he still tries to get in contact with me...i havnt told the police, iv tried, but i cant...Its been months now, and i still cant have any sort of physical contact with men, i cry myself to sleep some nights, i cant get it out of my mind...i dont trust anybody, i feel so alone and im constantly looking over my shoulder thinking he will just turn up out of the blue...i hate what i see in the mirror, i have no self esteem or confidence...i need help
Anonymous - 17/01/2013
ReplyHi Anonymous,
Thanks so much for your response.
We are truly sorry to hear about these traumatic incidents from your past. We think it is important that even though this may have happened some time ago, that you should really try to speak to someone about this if you can.
It's important to understand that being forced or pressured to have sex when you don’t want to is rape and it is a crime. Please understand that this was not your fault. There was nothing you could have done to prevent this.
Staying in a relationship where you are being emotionally and/or physically abused could cause you to lose your self-esteem and confidence. An abusive, violent or controlling relationship is not normal or acceptable; nobody needs to tolerate this behaviour, you were right to leave and seek help. Emotional abuse can include someone putting you down, or calling you nasty names, trying to control you and stopping you doing certain things or making you do things you don’t want to do, it is important to find someone you trust to talk to. You have been suffering from emotional and physical abuse, the Spot the Signs page includes behaviours that may mean you’re in an abusive relationship, have a look here - http://thisisabuse.direct.gov.uk/worried-about-abuse.
You are clearly distressed, please talk to a trusted adult, this doesn’t have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and you feel you can trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with.
You can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).
Victim Support can provide a confidential service as well, you can find your nearest centre by visiting their website http://www.victimsupport.org.uk/, or call their Supportline on 0845 30 30 900. If you want to hide your number, press 141 before dialing. Normal opening hours for the Supportline are 9am – 9pm Mondays to Fridays, 9am – 7pm weekends and 9am – 5pm bank holidays.
You can also speak to the police. Most police forces have specially trained police officers to help people who have been raped or sexually assaulted. If you ever feel that you are in immediate danger, call the police on 999.
bam
16/01/2013
hi were to start well iv been seeing this girl for a few years its a long distance relastionship but when we first met she told me she a ex boy friend that did not get the term that it was over for both of them so on july last year she told be she crossd path with him at the park she gose to i asked he did any thing go wrong she no i was like ok cool but i could not help the feeling she was hiding some thing so i asked he to be open with me cause i love her etc when she told she said that her ex pulld her in to the tolits at the park and well raped her when she told me that i basicly lost it not at her but at her ex on what he did after a few months she recoverd from it but me well that why i am here all i could think about was what he did i had nightmares about what happend i felt low guilty cause i said i would keep her safe i felt like i faild her i let her down etc so after a few months i go and viset her during my time with her we noticed that ther was some thing off so i got her a pregncy tester and it shows positve she was pregnat with his chiled by 13 weeks of coures she had it removed but the fact the feelling of vengence and anger hate all those emotions are still in me and the wrid thing is his perants seem to think it not his fault that he did what he did it to do with his autisim i not trying to point the finger at people with any form of autsim cause i my self have fourm of it but i never heard of that being the cause of a rape attack but still to this day i have trouble trying to clear my head of what happend thats my story hop you can help me start a better future fo me an my fiance now
bam - 16/01/2013
ReplyHi Bam,
Thanks for your post.
Tell your fiance you are worried about her and let her know that the abuse was not her fault, it’s unacceptable and that support is available. Rape is a crime.
When you try to talk to her, try not to make her feel judged as it takes courage to admit abuse. Encourage her to talk to a trusted adult, and encourage her to talk to the police. You shouldn’t confront her ex on your own and neither should your fiance.
If she wants to speak to someone in confidence encourage her to contact the 24 hour, National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247.
Alternatively she can call National Freephone Rape Crisis Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999, 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm. Or you can visit www.rapecrisis.org.uk for further advice and information.
If you have been sexually assaulted you can also speak to the police. Most police forces have specially trained police officers who can help.
If you want to talk to someone about your fiance's past abuse and how to help her, The Samaritans may also be able to help, take a look at their website at http://www.samaritans.org.uk/ or email jo@samaritans.co.uk. You can also call the Samaritans helpline on 08457 909090.
ursula
15/01/2013
It all happened at my Granddads farm, for my cousin it was perfect because people were often miles away from the farm house and it would be empty. The first time it happened I had had an amazing day, playing around the farm and building dens with my cousins, we had agreed to meet up after bedtime to discuss what we were going to do the next day. I found this all very exciting because I was breaking rules and doing something that I enjoyed with cousins I loved. So later that evening I sneaked into this room and was slightly confused to why only my older cousin was there and not both of them, though I dismissed this. Thinking back he seemed fidgety and restless. I was getting cold perched on the end of his bed in the freezing house with no heaters, he said to get in bed with him, I thought this was very innocent at the time and climbed in next to him considering I was cold. He suddenly threw himself on me, almost crushing me so I couldn't move, and started touching me and shoving himself down my throat. I managed to wriggle away, fell out of the bed and ran back to my own room. That night I couldn't take my eyes of the door in fear he would come after me. I didn't sleep at all.
The second time, again it happened at the farm, and my door handle to my bedroom was broken, typical of the farm house. It meant if you closed the door, the handle would keep spinning and you wouldn't be able to open the door from the inside. My older cousin came in with his friend and knowing about the door, shut it. He started throwing me around the room and bashing me against the furniture and walls. He threw me on the bed, and jumped on me. I tried to stop him but he was too strong. He was touching me and hurting me and i couldn't do anything about it. Finally, my mum came and found us, she had no idea of what had just happened. Plus it was very easy to hide, if she asked if something was up I would just say that we'd had an argument. I was ashamed of how weak I was, how stupid I was, how I let him - twice.
The farm was a place of sanctuary and adventure.
Now I cant bare to be there.
Because of him and how he made me feel, along with other factors in my life, I have struggled with anorexia, insomnia, self-harm, alcohol dependancy, putting myself in risky situations at night and overdosing over the past 3 years. I'm 15 now.
He's my cousin, someone I trusted.
I was nine.
ursula - 15/01/2013
ReplyHi Ursula
We’re sorry to hear about what your cousin did to you.
First of all, it’s important to understand that none of this was your fault. There was nothing you could have done to prevent it. Being forced or pressured to have sex or take part in sexual activity that you don’t feel comfortable with is unacceptable, and sex with any girl/boy under 16, including oral, is unlawful.
Our best advice to help you deal with what happened and the other issues you’re struggling with, is to find someone you trust to talk to. We know it’s not easy, but there are people who understand, and who can help you. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and trust.
If you’re not comfortable speaking to someone you know, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
We hope this helps.
Anonymos
15/01/2013
I know this wont be as half as bad as some of the people on here, and I apolagise if anyone feels this is a waist of time, but a wile ago I went to a party, I knew a few girls but nobody else, I was shy so my few friends were offering me there drink, after a wile I'd drank so much, I was so drunk I remember being one place one minute and somewhere else the next, I can hardly remember but I remember kissing this boy and he took me out side with his friend, I was falling all over the place and could barley stand up, the next thing I knew one boy was behind me and the other boy had his privates in my face, I genuinely felt to drunk to do or say anything I was just falling about in some muddy bush with two boys I hardly new, the next thing I new I was on the floor by myself and the other two boys ran off telling there mates they'd just 'smashed' me and we'd had a threesome, I didn't even knew I'd done it, I just remember few few parts:/, I then stubbled my way out of the bush and a girl helped me inside, I had to stop at her house because I was too drunk to go home, the next morning everyone was laughing at me and calling me a 'dirty bitch', I could barley remember anything and I already hated myself for what had happend, i was only 15 at the time and the boys were one year older than me, I have no idea if this is classed as rape because I never said no or pushed them away as far as I'm aware, but I can't stop thinking about what happened and hating myself for it, please help
Anonymos - 15/01/2013
ReplyHi Anonymos,
Thanks for sharing your experience.
Being forced or pressured into having sex or taking part in sexual activity that you don’t feel comfortable with, even when under the influence of alcohol, is unacceptable and unlawful. Please know that what happened when you were 15 was not your fault. There was nothing you could have done to prevent it.
We recommend that you try and find someone you trust to talk to, to help you cope with what happened. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and trust.
You can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call the National Freephone Rape Crisis Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999, 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm. Or you can visit www.rapecrisis.org.uk for further advice and information.
Lux
14/01/2013
OK so about 4 years ago I went out with this guy for a few months. On the first date he took me to play snooker with some of his friends who were only 2 years older than us. I was wearing a skirt and they kept potting the white ball and asking me to bend down to get it. That made me feel uncomfortable. Then I went back to my boyfriends house and we were watching TV and he started touching my boobs and kissing me but I didn't want to so he said "come on your parents will be here soon and I haven't had any time alone with you today." so I gave in and just let him kiss me while I batted his hand away from my top. We broke up and then about a year later he said he wanted to talk to me about something so I went to meet him and as we were walking he put his arm around my shoulders, which was fine until his hand started reaching around to my boobs again. Then he moved his hand down and started feeling me up. I pushed him away and ran. Now I don't trust men and I'm afraid of being in a relationship because of this and what's worse is that my friend is now dating him and I'm worried he might be doing the same to her but I can't tell her about it. In fact, I've only told one person what happened and they didn't believe me.
There was another incident when I was 11. I was at my brother's wedding and my sister-in-law's family friend's son, who was about 14 at the time, took a liking to me. We walked around and talked for a bit and then he asked if he could kiss me. I said yes but then he started running his hands all over my body and I know I didn't agree to that. Then he started to get pushy. He tried to keep me there when I tried to run by pushing me up against the wall so I did the only thing I could. I kicked him where it would hurt just so I could get away.
Both of these experiences have affected the way I think about men and I am terrified of being in a relationship because I don't want that to happen again. I really think I need help but I also have issues trusting people now. Are these incidents classed as sexual assault?
Lux - 14/01/2013
ReplyHi Lux,
Being forced or pressured to have sex or take part in sexual activity that you don’t feel comfortable with is totally unacceptable. It's important to understand that this was not your fault and there was nothing you could have done to prevent this.
If you are ever being put under pressure to have sex or engage in sexual activity when you don’t want to, find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and trust.
If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.
If you think you have spotted some of the warning signs of abuse in your friend’s relationship, they may need professional help and your encouragement and support to help to stop it.Tell your friend you are worried about them and let them know that the abuse is not their fault, it’s unacceptable and that support is available.
Don't ignore the issue if you think it is happening. When you try to talk to them, try not to make them feel judged as it takes courage to admit abuse. Encourage them to talk to a trusted adult, and if their boyfriend has been violent or forced them to have sex, encourage them to talk to the police. You shouldn’t confront their boyfriend on your own and neither should your friend.
If you or yourr friend want to speak to someone in confidence contact the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 or Childline on 0800 11 11. You can also go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively you can call National Freephone Rape Crisis Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999, 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm. Or you can visit www.rapecrisis.org.uk for further advice and information.
The Samaritans may also be able to help, take a look at their website at http://www.samaritans.org.uk/ or email jo@samaritans.co.uk. You can also call the Samaritans helpline on 08457 909090.
Anonymous
14/01/2013
When I was 14 I was in a relationship. Being only 14, this was quite a childish one. We used to mess around, at times, and have foreplay and stuff. He used to (if I may be blunt) put his private part next to mine and ask me to trust him, that he won't lose my virginity. One day he just sort of pushed it in. I remember tears protruding down my face and it's almost like I froze. I couldn't actually digest what was happening. I always blamed myself because I was playing with fire. However, I sometimes wonder whether it is, in fact, a case of (so to speak) rape. I'm not even sure if I, or this, sounds ridiculous... I wonder whether that is related to abuse, or simply by being naive. or both.
I know it's not as serious as an actual rape incident. Although, after such an incident, I find it really hard to trust men. And in a way, it has made me feel worthless at times, like my body is only a means of pleasure for the opposing sex.
I would like to send a message out to anyone reading this, too. It's not ok for men to mistreat you. and if such a man does, you need to stay strong, and know that you're worthy.
Anonymous - 14/01/2013
ReplyHi Anonymous
Thanks for sharing your story.
Being forced or pressured to take part in a sexual activity that you didn’t feel comfortable with, particularly at the age of 14, was unacceptable. Please know that this was not your fault.
Even though this incident may have happened some time ago, you should try to speak to someone about it if you can. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable with. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and that you feel comfortable with and trust.
You can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.
Alternatively, you can speak to the police. Most police forces have specially trained police officers who can help. You can contact the police immediately by dialling 999.
We hope this helps.
Kelly
14/01/2013
I have been raped and I just wanted to comment on your ad I found it distressing as it brought back painful memories but I am glad that it has been aired as it brings awarness to the issue just wanted to say keep up the good work and abit of advice to anyone else who finds it distressing to simply change the channel as I do
Kelly - 14/01/2013
ReplyI find it quite distressing too but I normally just look away especially as they show it in the cinema. O.o Although it can be uncomfortable, I don't mind it because it makes people aware of it.
When it comes on in the cinema, I look at other people to see their expressions and if they're taking it seriously or not so it's quite interesting at the same time.
Hannah - 24/04/2013
Rebekah
14/01/2013
I was wondering if you are campaigning to have the legal definition of rape in the UK changed to acknowledge all victims and to punish all rapists? And if not, why not?
I've seen a couple of comments on here about female-on-male rape and it got me thinking... not only are their limited places for male victims to go but now their rape is not even acknowledged by law either, they have to sit there well law enforcement and the courts tell them that a female being raped will always take priority over them... even when they aren't saying it directly, this is what the law is showing.
It needs to change.
Rebekah - 14/01/2013
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