This website works best using cookies, which are currently enabled. To find out more about cookies and for information on how to turn them off, click here.
This is ABUSE

Help uscall outabuse

HAVE YOUR SAY

Tell us what you think about abuse in relationships

If you've got something you'd like to talk about regarding any kind of relationship abuse, come and Have Your Say on our message board.

Have a read through the discussion boards, the chances are you'll be able to talk with someone who's gone through similar experiences to your own.

Seen the ads? What do you think?

TELL US WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT ABUSE IN RELATIONSHIPS

If you've got something to say about abuse in relationships then you'll need to accept our terms before you can take part - please see our rules on the right side of the page. You can then enter your comments below or under any video you want to talk about.

  • This is so we can email you to let you know if there's been any replies to your message. Your email address will never be shown or passed on to anyone.
  • I wish to opt out of notification emails

Pages 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 > >>

Results: 1 - 15 of 2116

  • Sarah

    15/11/2014

    I've been with my boyfriend for a little over a year, he's been jealous and controlling since day one. He tells me who I can hang out with and when, made me delete social profiles, tells me what I can't wear, calls me names. He wasn't ever physically abusive until the night before last. We were arguing while I was vacuuming and he stormed over and grabbed the vacuum from me then smashed it into pieces. Then he grabbed my arms, slammed me into the wall, punched a dent in the wall next to my head, and punched out the window on the other side of me. We kept going from room to room fighting. He kept grabbing my arms and wrists hard and at one point I shoved him, he shoved me back hard and I tried to swing at him, and he picked me up, slammed me to the ground and told me to stay down and not move. I said okay and he started pacing around the living room freaking out. I told him I was going to leave and he said that he would kill himself. Then I crawled over to him, started kissing his shoulders and knees. I apologized for everything and begged him to stay with me. Now he's acting like nothing happened, and I feel totally empty inside. I'm afraid to leave him because he's got a lot of really bad stuff going on in his life right now and I really think he's being serious about taking his life. I love him so much it hurts, I have emotional meltdowns when I think about leaving him, but I can't forget about what happened and I can't act like it never happened. I don't know what to do.

    Sarah - 15/11/2014

    Reply
    • Hi there

      Thank you for your post. Staying in a relationship where you are being emotionally and/or physically abused could cause you to lose your self-esteem and confidence. Signs of physical abuse can include slapping, kicking, hitting or injuries as a result of violent behaviour, and signs of emotional abuse can include someone putting you down, calling you nasty names, trying to control you and preventing you from doing certain things or making you do things you don’t want to do.

      An abusive, violent or controlling relationship is not normal or acceptable; nobody needs to tolerate this behaviour and if the bullying is making you worried you need to speak to a trusted adult.

      If you’re under 18 and you need to talk to someone in confidence contact ChildLine on 0800 11 11 or go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact ChildLine by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      If you’re over 18, contact the 24 hour, National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247.

      We hope this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team

      This Is Abuse team 20/11/2014

  • Damaris

    15/11/2014

    I'm 16 and my boyfriend is 20 and he is incredibly protective of me, he is pretty controlling and doesn't let me go out often or do things like smoke (even though he does) because he says I will make a fool out of myself. He doesn't like other people messaging me no matter their gender because he feels like I'm going to cheat on him although I never have and constantly remind him how much I love him. He also has random out bursts of anger everyday and it can get really scary because he calls me names and threatens me and after makes me 'make it up to him' by having sex with him or sending him nude pics of myself or doing sexual activities over Skype although I told him I don't feel comfortable doing things like that. He also tells lies like he has been in a car crash or been stopped by the police for drugs and makes me go along with it every time. He puts me under so much pressure all the time and is in constant communication with me via text and threatens to break up with me if I don't reply because I'm at school or do as he says and I don't know how much longer I can keep going. I've tried to break it off with him before but he said it wasn't for me to decide. I love him but I don't know how to cope anymore. I find myself in tears twice a day worrying. I just feel trapped.

    Damaris - 15/11/2014

    Reply
    • Hi there

      Thank you for your post. We’re really sorry to hear you’ve been suffering emotional abuse. Abuse is wrong and never okay, it’s not normal, it can damage your confidence and your self-worth. Signs of this type of abuse can include someone putting you down, calling you nasty names, trying to control you and preventing you from doing certain things or making you do things you don’t want to do.

      We would encourage you to find someone you trust to talk to, it’s important you speak up about what you’ve been going through. This doesn’t have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.

      As you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk in confidence about any problem. No problem is too big or small for them. Alternatively, you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      We hope that this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team

      This Is Abuse team 20/11/2014

  • Kate

    10/11/2014

    When I was sixteen I was in a relationship with a boy who did not understand no. He used emotional blackmail and my own weakness and fear to 'convince' me to sleep with him for almost a year. I am 21 now and sometimes when people touch my skin I want to throw up. I don't want to waste your time, and I know that what happened to me is nothing compared to what some people have been through, but I am not coping very well. I feel awful. Please help.

    Kate - 10/11/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Kate

      Thanks for posting on the site.

      If you’ve being forced or pressured to have sex, or take part in sexual activity that you don’t feel comfortable with, that is totally unacceptable, no one should be putting you in that position. Please understand that what happened was not your fault and there was nothing you could have done to prevent it, don’t blame yourself.

      If you are unsure, examples of sexual abuse or assault can include being touched in a sexual way that makes you feel uncomfortable or frightened (this can be through clothes or not), being forced to watch others engage in sexual activity, being pressured to send naked pictures of yourself, sexting and being made to stimulate yourself or others.

      If this has happened to you, we would always encourage you to try and find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable talking to. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. And if they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and happy, and help and support is out there.

      If you’re over 18, you can call the National Freephone Rape Crisis Helpline to talk to an advisor on 0808 802 9999, 7 days a week between 12pm – 2.30pm and 7pm – 9.30pm. They offer counselling and support for women who have experienced any form of sexual violence, not just rape.

      We hope that this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team

      This Is Abuse team 11/11/2014

  • marie

    09/11/2014

    Im being abused by my partner hes hitting me in the face pulling my hair out ive no where to go ive tried to fight back hes even put a pillow over my face ive bit him to get him off me ive punched him back ive got absolutely no where to go and all my posessions are here in this house i want him out till i can get somewhere to live it could take a month how do i go about it

    marie - 09/11/2014

    Reply
    • Hi there

      Thanks for your post on the site. We’re really sorry to hear you have been suffering physical abuse. Abuse is wrong and never okay, it’s not normal and it can seriously damage your confidence and your self-worth. Signs of physical abuse can include slapping, kicking, hitting or injuries as a result of violent behaviour.

      It’s very important to try and find someone you trust to talk to about what’s been happening in your relationship. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable talking to. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there, you’re not on your own.

      If you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem. No problem is too big or small for them. Alternatively, you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      If you’re over 18, you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).

      You can also hear from a survivor of domestic violence here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7a8fsrPEaYQ&list=UU697e0rGEZK8tO-qmFN6kag&index=3&feature=plcp

      We hope that this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team

      This Is Abuse team 11/11/2014

  • rebecca

    30/10/2014

    I was in rrelationship and ever since we broke up he has been forcing me to send him nudes and he sends me them and he show his friends and it's wrecking my like and I'm 14 I don't want my parents to know

    rebecca - 30/10/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Rebecca

      Thanks for your post. We’re really sorry to hear about what you’ve been going through. If you’re being forced or pressured to take part in sexual activity that you don’t feel comfortable with, that is totally unacceptable, no one should be putting you in that position. Please understand that what’s happened is not your fault and there was nothing you could have done to prevent it, don’t blame yourself.

      If you are unsure, examples of sexual abuse or assault can include being touched in a sexual way that makes you feel uncomfortable or frightened (this can be through clothes or not), being forced to watch others engage in sexual activity, being pressured to send naked pictures of yourself, sexting and being made to stimulate yourself or others.

      If this has happened to you, we would always encourage you to try and find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable talking to. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. And if they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and happy, and help and support is out there.

      As you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem, nothing is too big or small for them. They won’t judge you; they will listen, advise and guide you. Or alternatively you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      We hope this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team

      This Is Abuse team 07/11/2014

  • Georgia

    29/10/2014

    I was 14 and I was in a relationship with this boy for 2 yrs.Everything was fine at first,then he became controlling and abusive.he started off pulling my hair or pinching me,but then 6 months in, it got to the point where I was petrified of him,he threw me down the stairs,punched me,told me I was fat and never let me go out with friends.He used to take my lunch away because he wanted me to lose weight,I never told anyone until family noticed bruises. They made me cut all contact with him,it's been a year now since I left him and he's still in my head,everybody thinks I'm ok and over it but I can't sleep,I have flashbacks of it and I have no self confidence in myself,I can't eat big meals in front of anybody as I don't want to be judged on my weight,I'm still struggling with my life because of him and it's horrible.

    Georgia - 29/10/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Georgia

      We’re sorry to hear you’ve suffered emotional and physical abuse. Abuse is wrong and never okay, it’s not normal, it can damage your confidence and your self-worth. Signs of emotional type of abuse can include someone putting you down, calling you nasty names, trying to control you and preventing you from doing certain things or making you do things you don’t want to do. Signs of physical abuse can include slapping, kicking, hitting or injuries as a result of violent behaviour.

      We would encourage you to find someone you trust to talk to, it’s important you speak up about what you’ve been going through. This doesn’t have to be someone in authority, just someone who you think you can talk to and trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.

      If you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk in confidence about any problem. No problem is too big or small for them. Alternatively, you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      If you’re over 18, you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).

      We hope that this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team

      This Is Abuse team 29/10/2014

  • Danielle

    29/10/2014

    Well me and my boyfriend skype each other everyday and he is a year older then me (I'm 14). He masturbates a lot and always asks to see my boobs. I don't want to but I don't want to lose him. Is this abuse/rape?

    Danielle - 29/10/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Danielle

      Thanks for your post. We’re sorry to hear about what you’ve been going through. If you’re being forced or pressured to take part in sexual activity that you don’t feel comfortable with, that is totally unacceptable, no one should be putting you in that position. Please understand that what’s happened is not your fault and there was nothing you could have done to prevent it, don’t blame yourself.

      If you are unsure, examples of sexual abuse or assault can include being touched in a sexual way that makes you feel uncomfortable or frightened (this can be through clothes or not), being forced to watch others engage in sexual activity, being pressured to send naked pictures of yourself, sexting and being made to stimulate yourself or others.

      If this has happened to you, we would always encourage you to try and find someone you trust to talk to. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable talking to. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. And if they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and happy, and help and support is out there.

      As you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem, nothing is too big or small for them. They won’t judge you; they will listen, advise and guide you. Or alternatively you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      We hope this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team

      This Is Abuse team 07/11/2014

  • Abbie

    29/10/2014

    I've been with my boyfriend for a year now and I can't say it's been the best year of my life. I do love him and he means a lot to me but I hate him at the same time, he checks my phone every day and doesn't let me go on social networking sites or speak to my friends or see them, I attend college and all he does is accuse me of all sorts. I mean he accuses me of flirting with girls and boys and even his sister. I can honestly say I haven't done that at all because I know he would just start an argument. When we have an argument over text he always says if he gives me another chance then I do as he says I always accept that because I don't know what life would be like with out him. When we have a serious argument over the phone he always resorts to speaking to his ex's and other girls, but if we argue in person he shout really loudly and raises his hand to me. Once before he has pinned me down on the floor and shouted right in my face so I ran upstairs and cries for hours and he just stood in the room giving me grief. He makes me do things I don't want to do and he knows full well I don't want too but he just doesn't take my feelings into consideration. When the relationship is good it's alright he's always making me laugh and smile, I just don't know what to do anymore I love him but I don't want to feel unhappy and useless and worthless anymore. I know this isn't anything serious and there are more serious things going on else where I just needed a bit of help, thanks x

    Abbie - 29/10/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Abbie

      Thanks for posting. We’re really sorry to hear you’ve been suffering emotional abuse. Abuse is wrong and never okay, it’s not normal, it can damage your confidence and your self-worth. Signs of this type of abuse can include someone putting you down, calling you nasty names, trying to control you and preventing you from doing certain things or making you do things you don’t want to do.

      We would encourage you to find someone you trust to talk to, it’s important you speak up about what you’ve been going through. This doesn’t have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.

      If you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk in confidence about any problem. No problem is too big or small for them.

      Alternatively, you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      If you’re over 18, you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).

      We hope this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team

      This Is Abuse team 29/10/2014

  • anonymous

    26/10/2014

    me and my partner been together nearly 3 years, I am now almost 19 and hes 19 and we have a little girl aged 15 months, ever since after the birth of our daughter the abuse started, he has punched, thrown me against a wall, doors, slapped and the list could go on, I really want to leave him but I have no place to go to, as we live together. just don't know where to turn for help.

    anonymous - 26/10/2014

    Reply
    • Hi there

      Thanks for posting. We're really sorry to hear you have been suffering physical abuse. Abuse is wrong and never okay, it’s not normal and it can seriously damage your confidence and your self-worth. Signs of physical abuse can include slapping, kicking, hitting or injuries as a result of violent behaviour.

      It’s very important to try and find someone you trust to talk to about what’s been happening in your relationship. It could be a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable talking to. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there, you’re not on your own.

      As you’re over 18, you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).

      You can also hear from a survivor of domestic violence here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7a8fsrPEaYQ&list=UU697e0rGEZK8tO-qmFN6kag&index=3&feature=plcp

      We hope this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team

      This Is Abuse team 29/10/2014

  • Siovonne

    13/10/2014

    Nearly 4 years ago, i was 13 and i was in a relationship with a guy who was 16. I thought that this was okay. But he started talking about sex all the time, and it was really frustrating, I didn't know what to do, I told him a million times I didn't want to do it, I wasn't ready, and he just wouldn't listen, and he kept talking about it. He then forced me into doing to so. And I haven't said anything about this to anyone, I've kept this a secret for the past 4 years. He raped me. And to this day, he still doesn't even know he did so. He even posted a status last year saying, and I quote, 'Any man who has raped someone should have their penis cut off as well as their fingers. Sick bastards..' And to this day, it still gets to me, and I get flash backs and it's horrible, I was 13.

    Siovonne Siovonne - 13/10/2014

    Reply
    • Hi there

      Thanks for posting. We’re really sorry to hear about this distressing incident from your past. We think it is really important that even though this may have happened some time ago, you should still try to speak to someone about this if you can.
      Being forced or pressured to have sex when you don’t want to is rape, it is a serious crime and it should be reported. Please understand that this was not your fault, there was nothing you could have done to prevent it.

      No matter how long ago it happened please try and find someone you trust to talk to - a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable talking to. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and happy, and help and support is out there.

      As you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem, nothing is too big or small for them. They won’t judge you; they will listen, advise and guide you. Or alternatively you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      You can also speak to the police. Most police forces have specially trained police officers to help people who have been raped or sexually assaulted.

      We hope that this helps.

      Take care,
      The This is Abuse team

      This Is Abuse team - 13/10/2014

  • Chelsey

    11/10/2014

    I don't no if it is abuse but every time we have an argument he always calls me a slag tramp and that IM worthless and threatens to hit me but hr hasn't he occasionally throws things at me but punches walls and doors and I always end up crying but when I do stand up to him he pulls my hair not really hard and he says he is gunna leave me but I dunno what to do should I leave him

    Chelsey - 11/10/2014

    Reply
    • Hi there

      Thanks for posting on the website. We’re sorry to hear you’ve been suffering emotional abuse. Abuse is wrong and never okay, it’s not normal, it can damage your confidence and your self-worth. Signs of this type of abuse can include someone putting you down, calling you nasty names, trying to control you and preventing you from doing certain things or making you do things you don’t want to do.

      We would encourage you to find someone you trust to talk to, it’s important you speak up about what you’ve been going through. This doesn’t have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.

      If you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk in confidence about any problem. No problem is too big or small for them.
      Alternatively, you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      If you’re over 18, you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).

      We hope this helps

      Take care
      The This is Abuse Team

      This Is Abuse team 13/10/2014

  • Chloe

    28/09/2014

    I've been with my boyfriend nearly 2 years. He's lovely ad says he wants a life with me and make mehappy most of the time. He's suffered with depression for a while and often uses it to his advantage even though he got discharged and off his meds. He is incredibly controlling he has to put me on my bus so he knows I'm going home, controls who I see and he has to be there, I can obliging to pubs not clubs, he goes through my texts and says his finger slipped, I can't go to a guys house, I can't put kisses to anyone in messages, including him, he hates them... I have to be by his side most of the time. If I do t reply to him he'll ring me to see where am. He wants for me after work to put me on my bus. He's stolen all my fried, they choose him over me. He has a go at me for saying certain things like 'okay 'oh'. 'Yeah'. 'I don't mind'. We've been on a break before over this and he said he'd change so may times bus hasn't. He's ruined two of my birthdays by saying if I good out he'll smoke weed and self harm. What should I do to fox this??

    Chloe - 28/09/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Chloe

      Thanks for posting. We’re sorry to hear you’ve been suffering emotional abuse. Abuse is wrong and never okay, it’s not normal, it can damage your confidence and your self-worth. Signs of this type of abuse can include someone putting you down, calling you nasty names, trying to control you and preventing you from doing certain things or making you do things you don’t want to do.

      We would encourage you to find someone you trust to talk to, it’s important you speak up about what you’ve been going through. This doesn’t have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.

      If you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk in confidence about any problem. No problem is too big or small for them. Alternatively, you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      If you’re over 18, you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).

      We hope that this helps.

      Take care,
      The This is Abuse team

      This Is Abuse team 10/10/2014

  • Anon.

    27/09/2014

    My ex threatened to leave if I didn't do a number of things. He wanted nude pictures and videos. I sent him the pictures because I was scared to lose him. But I couldn't send the video. He got really made and started sharing the pictures with everyone. He told me by the times he's finished I'll be famous and he's going to post it everywhere.

    I'm really scared he'll do it and I have no idea what to do.

    Please can you give me some advice

    Anon. - 27/09/2014

    Reply
    • Hi there

      Thanks for your message. It sounds like you're going through a really tough time and posting must have taken a lot of courage.

      Being pressured to send explicit pictures is abusive and is totally unacceptable, no one should be putting you in that position. It's also illegal to send indecent pictures of a person under 18 on to someone else.

      Please understand that what happened was not your fault and there was nothing you could have done to prevent it, don’t blame yourself.

      Please try and find someone you trust to talk to about what you're going through. It could be a teacher, a parent or other relative, a close friend, a youth worker or anyone else that you feel comfortable talking to. It doesn't have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. And if they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does. You have the right to be safe and happy, and help and support is out there.

      If you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk about any problem, nothing is too big or small for them. They won’t judge you; they will listen, advise and guide you. Or alternatively you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      If you’re over 18, you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).

      Please do contact one of the services detailed above, they will be able to help you.

      We hope this helps.

      Take care
      The This is Abuse team

      This Is Abuse team 30/09/2014

  • Narmeen

    26/09/2014

    I have just come out of a emotional abuse and blackmail filled relationship. He would call me nasty things and never trusted me and therefore didn't let me do anything. He would tell me not to talk to people and not to go out with my friends. He didn't let me do what I wanted to and then started threatening to smash my face in. Although this if the case and im out of the relationship I really want to go back to him I feel so lonely and miss him. I know its messed up but I don't know what to do. J need help.

    Narmeen - 26/09/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Narmeen

      Thanks for your message - it sounds like you are going through a really tough time.

      We’re sorry to hear you have suffered emotional abuse. Abuse is wrong and never okay, it’s not normal, it can damage your confidence and your self-worth. Signs of this type of abuse can include someone putting you down, calling you nasty names, trying to control you and preventing you from doing certain things or making you do things you don’t want to do.

      It can be very hard to leave an abusive relationship - no matter what kind. A big factor can simply be love. Love is such a powerful emotion it can overrule anything else. Please remember that staying in a relationship where you are being emotionally abused could cause you to lose your self-esteem and confidence. An abusive, violent or controlling relationship is not normal or acceptable; nobody needs to tolerate this behaviour.

      We would encourage you to find someone you trust to talk to, it’s important you speak up about what you’ve been through. This doesn’t have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.

      If you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk in confidence about any problem. No problem is too big or small for them. Alternatively, you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      If you’re over 18, you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).

      We hope this helps, and that you're able to get the support you deserve.

      Take care
      The This is Abuse team

      This Is Abuse team 10/10/2014

  • tammy

    26/09/2014

    I'm in an abusive relationship (mental, emotional,physical, verbal), we been together for 5 years. I have lost all strength. I a
    M no longer the same, I want to leave but his in my head so much that I believe I cant, if he leaves me I dunno how bt he makes it that I beg for him back, he refers to my past relationship all the time, ( I wasn't happy in that relationship either) this is my 2nd relationship, he calls me everything and anything, I cant do anything to prove to him I don't want my past or that I done nothing wrong in our relationship. He hits me, uses emotional abuse against me. My mood depends on his, so most days in angry,sad,fed up. I feel like I'm turning into bad person CUs I wish bad things upon him, I don't mean to but when it gets to me so much I do. He threatens my family(to me) I have lost ALL my friends over the years, the only one that knows is my brother but we don't talk about it I have just started sending him pics of my bruises w
    When it does happen. I just feel soooo alone and hopeless sometimes depressed. I'm scared and constantly emotional I jump at every sound I hear.
    I just want to be able to talk to someone who won't judge me, just know I'm not alone, any replies I would be so grateful.

    tammy - 26/09/2014

    Reply
    • Hi Tammy

      Thanks for your message, we are so sorry to hear about what you're going through.

      Abuse is wrong and never okay, it’s not normal, it can damage your confidence and your self-worth. Staying in a relationship where you are being emotionally or physically abused could cause you to lose your self-esteem and confidence. An abusive, violent or controlling relationship is not normal or acceptable; nobody needs to tolerate this behaviour and if the bullying is making you worried you need to speak to a trusted adult.

      We would encourage you to find someone you trust to talk to, it’s important you speak up about what you’ve been going through. This doesn’t have to be someone in authority, just someone that you think you can talk to and trust. If they don't want to listen, keep trying until you find someone that does, you have the right to be safe and help and support is out there.

      If you’re under 18, you can also call ChildLine on 0800 1111 to talk in confidence about any problem. No problem is too big or small for them. Alternatively, you can go to www.childline.org.uk where you can contact them by email and text, chat to a counsellor online or post to the message boards.

      If you’re over 18, you can call the 24 hour National Domestic Violence Freephone Helpline on 0808 2000 247 (run in partnership between Women’s Aid and Refuge).

      It can be very hard to leave an abusive relationship - no matter what kind. It’s also very important to leave the relationship safely. We would urge to think about completing a safety plan like this: http://www.respectnotfear.co.uk/keepingsafe/47-keeping-safe-in-an-unhealthy-relationship.html

      We hope that this helps, and that you're able to get the support you deserve.

      Take care
      The This is Abuse team

      This Is Abuse team 30/09/2014

Pages 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 > >>

Results: 1 - 15 of 2116

Terms and conditions of use

Please read and accept these rules below before commenting. All of the comments you post on this website are treated confidentially and moderated.

Stay safe – don't include any personal information in your comments, such as your surname, email address, street address and phone number.

Don't include the personal details of anyone else in your posts (including boyfriend/girlfriend, parents, guardians, teachers, social workers or group leaders).

Don't go off topic - keep your comments relevant to the "This Is Abuse" debate. People want their opinions to be heard – don't shout them down.

Don't post crude, racist, offensive, violent or vulgar messages to the site.

Treat everyone with respect – even if someone has a different view to your own, don't let it get personal.

Don't glamorise illegal or dangerous activities, including violence of any kind. It's ok to talk about your experiences but you shouldn't encourage others to do anything illegal or dangerous.

Don't write anything that's untrue about anyone else (including boyfriend/girlfriend, parents, guardians, teachers, social workers, group leaders and famous people). Don't write anything that could harm anyone else's reputation.

This isn't a dating site – it's a platform to talk about teenage relationship abuse and your opinions on the matter; don't use it to meet or flirt with other people.

Don't write everything in CAPS – it's the equivalent of shouting and isn't polite or easy for everyone to read.

Don't post entire messages in text speak – it's ok to shorten some words but not everyone understands text speak or finds it easy to read.

It's ok to post links to other websites as long as they're relevant to the "This Is Abuse" debate and don't break the house rules in any way.

Don't break copyright rules. This means that you shouldn't post text you didn't write.